Mel’s 5 Second Review: The Haunting in Connecticut

The Haunting in Connecticut
(2009) Virginia Madsen, Kyle Gallner, Elias Koteas, Martin Donovan, Amanda Crew, Sophi Knight, Ty Wood, Erik Berg, John Bluethner, John B Lowe and DW Brown

The-Haunting-in-Connecticut

For a film with such a generic title, it was pretty darn good. Great story (that I don’t believe for a second is true, but that’s besides the point), great acting, great everything. Scary too. It’s strange sometimes the things that end up scaring you the most. I can watch lots of different kinds of horror and not be fazed, but every so often, one film comes along that just hits every nerve just right (or should that be just wrong?) But I’m glad I discovered it nonetheless. Now that I’m massively creeped out though, it’s time to watch a chick flick. Or a kid’s film. Or funny cats on YouTube. Anything to change my mind from those creepy freaking ghosts! hehe. I give it a great 8.5/10.

This film (and its sequel, which I still haven’t seen) is currently streaming on Netflix if you’re in the mood for a scary good time! Enjoy! ๐Ÿ™‚

M.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: Prometheus

Prometheus
(2012) Noomi Rapace, Michael Fassbender, Charlize Theron, Idris Elba, Guy Pearce, Logan Marshall-Green, Sean Harris, Rafe Spall and Emun Elliott

prometheus

Oh, Prometheus, how could you have gone so very wrong? Where to even begin? The paper thin plot? The self-administered cesarean? People dying in the dumbest way possible (apparently, future folks can only run in straight lines)? Really I could go on for ages. But I won’t. I’ve already wasted enough of my life on this poor excuse of a movie. Could have been so good, it’s a real shame. There were so many problems in the script and the action, that it was just really hard to enjoy. All in all, quite disappointing. It gets nothing more than a very mediocre 5/10.

This movie is currently streaming on Netflix if you haven’t seen it and are in the mood to see a great franchise getting shat on. Enjoy ๐Ÿ˜‰

And here, instead of the real trailer, check out this Honest Trailer. It’s funny as hell, and probably better than the actual film :-p

M.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: Dark House

Dark House
(2009) Jeffrey Combs, Meghan Ory, Diane Louise Salinger, Matt Cohen, Shelly Cole, Danso Gordon, Ryan Melander, Bevin Prince, Erin Cummings and Ian Reed Kesler

Dark_House

A campy, scary good time. Jeffrey Combs, even after all these years, is still awesome! The effects aren’t all that great, the acting is pretty shaky overall, but the story is interesting and, best of all, it’s got that late 80’s, early 90’s charm. Who says camp is dead?? Hehe ๐Ÿ˜€ A very fun 7.5/10.

This movie is currently streaming on Netflix. Enjoy! ๐Ÿ™‚

ย 

M.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: The Dark Knight Rises

The Dark Knight Rises
(2012) Christian Bale, Tom Hardy, Anne Hathaway, Michael Caine, Marion Cotillard, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Gary Oldman, Morgan Freeman, Matthew Modine, Alon Moni Aboutboul and Burn Gorman

the_dark_knight_rises

Was quite disappointed by this, especially seeing how good The Dark Knight was. I was bored out of my skull for the first half or so of the film. The acting was excellent, as I expected with so many strong actors, but man, was it dull. The second half picked up and was more enjoyable, but I was so bored that I almost didn’t make it there at all. And aside from the boringness, I dunno, but was I the only one who thought that this story was just… too much? It just seemed so overly convoluted, even for a Batman film. But still, I’ll give it a 6.5/10 for the effort that all the actors obviously gave.

The film is currently streaming on Netflix, if you care to try it out.

M.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: Fright Night

Fright Night
(2011) Anton Yelchin, Colin Farrell, David Tennant, Imogen Poots,Toni Collette, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Dave Franco, Reid Ewing and Sandra Vergara

FRIGHT NIGHT

Everyone seems to have hated the remake of Fright Night, but I enjoyed it. No, obviously it doesn’t hold a candle to the original, but I was still entertained. Plus David Tennant and Colin Farrell on the same screen? Really, what’s not to like there? hehe. I was a bit upset by what they did to Charley’s character (making him the type of guy who would dump his best friend for a blonde piece of tail), I found it made him much less sympathetic, and made his final scene with Ed much less poignant than it should have been. But despite Colin Farrell’s sexiness, it’s really David Tennant who steals the show. His Peter Vincent was a perfect modern updating of the character. I give it a solid 7.5/10.

The film is currently streaming on Netflix. If you haven’t seen it, go ahead and give it a chance. If you don’t sit there comparing every detail to the original, I’m sure you’d be pleasantly surprised.

M.

On Vacation

Hi guys!!

Sorry I haven’t been around for a while, I’ve been on vacation at my mom’s, and I didn’t bring my laptop and notebook, hence no new posts. I’m heading back home tomorrow, though, so I’ll hopefully have a new post for you all in a day or two.

As usual, thanks for reading, and see you soon!! ๐Ÿ™‚

M.

By VampirePlacebo Posted in Life

Mel’s 5 Second Review: Iron Man

Iron Man
(2008) Robert Downey Jr, Terrence Howard, Jeff Bridges, Gwyneth Paltrow, Leslie Bibb, Shaun Toub, Faran Tahir, Clark Gregg, Bill Smitrovich, Jon Favreau and Paul Bettany

Iron Man

Totally awesome! While I’d never imagined Robert Downey Jr (one of my favorite actors) as a superhero before this, he did a terrific job. The story, while not what I’d expected, was great, and not cheezy like some superhero movies. I even enjoyed Gwyneth Paltrow, who I don’t usually care for. Might I add that she looks surprisingly stunning as a red head? All the acting was incredible, I was glued to my seat the entire time, even when I had to pee so bad it almost hurt. I didn’t want to miss a moment. Of course I added it to my collection.ย Oh, and make sure to stay for the credits. There’s an extra goody at the end! I give it a solid 9.5/10.

This movie is currently streaming on Netflix. Enjoy!

M.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: The Innkeepers

The Innkeepers
(2011) Sara Paxton, Pat Healy, Kelly McGinnis, George Riddle and Brenda Cooney

innkeepers

Nice quiet horror film. Takes it’s time getting anywhere, but the ride is fun nonetheless. The acting is much better than I’d expected for such a low-budget indie film, and that was a pleasant surprise. I was hoping that it’d be scarier than it was (my heart-rate barely changed, hehe), but it was still a pleasant watch. I give it a solid 7/10.

This movie is currently streaming on Netflix. Enjoy! ๐Ÿ™‚

M.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: The Fourth Kind

The Fourth Kind
(2009) Milla Jovovich, Will Patton, Hakeem Kae-Kazim, Corey Johnson, Enzo Cilenti, Elias Koteas, Eric Loren, Mia McKenna-Bruce, Raphaรซl Coleman and Charlotte Milchard

Image

So, this is a pretty big meh. Had a few good scenes, but nothing spectacular. Also the “actual footage” thing only works when said footage is real. The “real” Dr Taylor is played by an actress named Charlotte Milchard. That kinda kills the whole credibility thing. I had heard that the film was really scary, so my expectations were pretty high when I started watching it. Needless to say, my expectations were nowhere near met. A very disappointing 5/10.

This movie is currently streaming on Netflix, if you don’t wanna take my word for it.

M.

Fishiest Queens on RuPaul’s Drag Race (Seasons 1 to 4)

Have no idea what a fishy queen is? Let me explain. A drag queen described as “fishy” is a drag queen who looks like a woman so much that she could easily be mistaken for the real thing. The ladies in this list are the fishiest queens from seasons 1 to 4 of RuPaul’s Drag Race.ย This is not to say that these were my favourite contestants on the show, just the girliest. A good half of my favourites aren’t going to be in this list because, while totally fierce, you can still tell there’s a man under all that makeup. So here they are, my fishy queens, in alphabetical order (cause I’m too lazy to take the time to rank them in order of fishiness :-p ).

ย 

Image

We unfortunately didn’t get to see much of Alisa, she was the first to be sent home in season 4. She’s incredibly beautiful, but unfortunately the judges weren’t wowed by her “post-apocalyptic couture”, and she got the boot. Too bad, I’d have liked to see more of her.

ย 

Image

Carmen is dumber than a sack of bricks, and I felt like smacking her around a few times, but she really is gorgeous. Her first runway look of season 3 almost literally took my breath away. How a boy got blessed with a body like that is crazy (and unfair!! hehe).

ย 

Image

One of my top 5 queens, Chad is a stunner. Put her side to side (in full drag) with Cher, and it’d be mighty hard to tell the two apart!

ย 

Image

At the beginning of the season she was a little rough around the edges, but after a little grooming from Ru and the judges, she became one of the fiercest of the season. She beautiful, and it’s very easy to forget she’s really a man.

ย 

Image

Little Kenya! What she lacked in height, she certainly made up for in beauty. Absolutely stunning, and so fishy that even out of drag it’s hard to tell that she’s a boy.

ย 

Image

Definitely not one of my favourite queens, but it’s undeniable that she’s fishy. She’s got very soft, feminine features, it’s just too bad that, in fierceness, she was just so… meh.

ย 

Image

Abrasive the moment she opens her mouth, it was hard to root for her to take the crown (not that I was anyways, but that’s not the point :-p ). But she’s definitely beautiful, there’s no denying that. She’s feminine even out of drag, so once in drag it’s almost impossible to tell that she’s a he.

ย 

Image

I didn’t particularly like Mariah, despite her fishiness. She was a little stand-offish and cold, and always looked slightly bored. She’s definitely a dude out of drag, but the makeup completely transforms her, making it very easy to mistake her for the real thing.

ย 

Image

Oh Phi Phi. I spent most of season 4 just wanting her to go away, but drama gets the ratings (lord only knows why, ugh), so I had to put up with her till the very last episode of the season. She’s not always fishy, especially when she “drags too much” (puts on too much makeup, which I didn’t even know was a thing in the drag world), but when she tones it down and really tries for that real girl look, she nails it.

ย 

Image

Another queen who’s not always fishy (especially when she’s got that 5 o’clock shadow showing), but when she gets her makeup and hair just right, you can hardly tell that she’s a he.

ย 

Image

As beautiful as she is, I’d completely forgotten about her by the time I started making this post. Being that forgettable is a big no-no when you’re trying to be any kind of star, but most especially for a drag performer. But if fishiness was the only qualification needed, she’d definitely have been in the top.

ย 

Image

Stacy was all kinds of awesome. Such a kind, soft person, she almost doesn’t belong in the drag world. While she may not be many people’s definition of beauty, she is definitely one of the fishiest queens in the history of the show. Even out of drag, evenย naked, she still looked like a woman.

ย 

Image

I could never decide if I liked Tatianna or not. She’s undeniably beautiful, even more so than most women (bitch!), but she could be so annoying. And bitchy! Oh my god, so bitchy! I suppose that’s what happens when you’re that gorgeous… :-p

ย 

Image

I was so looking forward to a season with this quirky, fun performer, but unfortunately she failed to impress the judges, and was sent home first. I really don’t understand why. Yes, her “christmas couture” was a little busy, but I really liked it. And she looked stunning.

ย 

Image

With her eccentric look, Yara was one of my favourites. She wasn’t always fishy, but when she got it right, she got itย damn right!

ย 

And that’s my list! I’ll eventually get around to watching the later seasons, and I’ll do an updated version of this post when I do, and I’ll also do a post of my favourite queens, the ones I was rooting for. But, till then, bye bye!! ๐Ÿ™‚

M.