My Top 30 Films of the 90’s

I didn’t remember just how many amazing movies were made in the 90’s. I must have made a list of 50 films I loved and then had to pair it down to 30. I was not happy. And then just as I thought I was finished the list, a movie that I forgot came to mind and I had to shift everything. But I finally decided upon 30, so here they are, my 30 favourite films of the 90’s.

Number 30

Title: Scream
Year: 1996
Plot: In the small town of Woodsboro, California, a masked killer begins murdering high school students, and a group of friends must use their knowledge of horror movies to unmask the killer.
Starring: Neve Campbell, Courteney Cox, David Arquette, Skeet Ulrich, Rose McGowan, Matthew Lillard, Jamie Kennedy, Drew Barrymore, Roger Jackson (v.o.)
Directed by: Wes Craven
Based on: An original screenplay written by Kevin Williamson, although he was heavily inspired by the true story of the “Gainesville Ripper”, Danny Rolling, who murdered several college students in 1990.
Notes: So, I know, why is Scream all the way at number 30? Because I sometimes have weird tastes and there’s just 29 movies I love more, that’s why! But yes, of course, this movie is a modern classic. I’m generally not a fan of slashers, but this one is great.

Number 29

Title: The Iron Giant
Year: 1999
Plot: A young boy befriends a giant robot from outer space that a paranoid government agent wants to destroy.
Starring: Eli Marienthal, Harry Connick Jr, Jennifer Aniston, Vin Diesel, Christopher McDonald, John Mahoney, M Emmet Walsh, Cloris Leachman
Directed by: Brad Bird
Based on: The book The Iron Man by Ted Hughes.
Notes: This has to be one of my favourite animations ever. It’s both hilarious and heartwarming. Keep some kleenex close, you’re gonna need it!

Number 28

Title: Practical Magic
Year: 1998
Plot: Two witch sisters, raised by their eccentric aunts in a small town, face closed-minded prejudice and a curse which threatens to prevent them ever finding lasting love.
Starring: Sandra Bullock, Nicole Kidman, Stockard Channing, Dianne Wiest, Aidan Quinn, Goran Visnjic, Evan Rachel Wood, Alexandra Artrip
Directed by: Griffin Dunne
Based on: The book Practical Magic by Alice Hoffman.
Notes: The perfect blend of chick flick and supernatural. And how disgustingly beautiful were Sandra and Nicole?? My goodness..

Number 27

Title: The Matrix
Year: 1999
Plot: When a beautiful stranger leads computer hacker Neo to a forbidding underworld, he discovers the shocking truth: the life he knows is the elaborate deception of an evil cyber-intelligence.
Starring: Keanu Reeves, Laurence Fishburne, Carrie-Anne Moss, Hugo Weaving, Joe Pantoliano, Marcus Chong, Gloria Foster, Matt Doran, Julian Arahanga, Anthony Ray Parker
Directed by: Lana Wachowski, Lilly Wachowski
Based on: An original script written by the Wachowski’s, but they admitted to being heavily inspired by the philosophical book Simulacra and Simulation by Jean Baudrillard.
Notes: This movie is, in a word, iconic. Never mind the slew of sequels that got progressively worse, this movie was so good. Great ideas paired with top-notch action scenes; it was a must-see of the 90s.

Number 26

Title: The Craft
Year: 1996
Plot: After transferring to a Los Angeles high school, Sarah finds that her telekinetic gift appeals to a group of three wannabe witches, who happen to be seeking a fourth member for their rituals.
Starring: Robin Tunney, Fairuza Balk, Neve Campbell, Rachel True, Skeet Ulrich, Breckin Meyer, Christine Taylor, Assumpta Serna
Directed by: Andrew Fleming
Based on: An original screenplay written by Peter Filardi and Andrew Fleming.
Notes: The other movie that came out in ’96 starring Neve Campbell and Skeet Ulrich, I personally prefer this one. Maybe it’s because I identified more with the outcast goth girls? Probably. But this is just a fun witchcraft movie that I can still enjoy even though I’m no longer a teen.

Number 25

Title: Dragonheart
Year: 1996
Plot: The last living dragon and a disillusioned dragon-slaying knight must unite to stop an evil king, who was granted partial immortality.
Starring: Dennis Quaid, Sean Connery (v.o.), Dina Meyer, David Thewlis, Pete Postlethwaite, Jason Isaacs, Brian Thompson
Directed by: Rob Cohen
Based on: An original screenplay written by Charles Edward Pogue and Patrick Read Johnson.
Notes: I haven’t watched this since the early 2000s I’d wager, so I can’t be sure if the cgi holds up. But I remember it being pretty great.

Number 24

Title: The Prophecy
Year: 1995
Plot: Archangel Gabriel is searching for the soul of a supremely evil human to win a war that’s raging between angels and bring hell on earth.
Starring: Christopher Walken, Elias Koteas, Virginia Madsen, Eric Stoltz, Viggo Mortensen, Amanda Plummer, Adam Goldberg, Moriah Shining Dove Snyder
Directed by: Gregory Widen
Based on: An original screenplay written by Gregory Widen.
Notes: Viggo as Lucifer is one of the most unsettling, even downright scary, things you’ll ever see. Holy crap.

Number 23

Title: To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Newmar
Year: 1995
Plot: Three drag queens travel cross-country until their car breaks down, leaving them stranded in a small town where they turn the resident’s lives upside down.
Starring: Patrick Swayze, Wesley Snipes, John Leguizamo, Stockard Channing, Jason London, Jennifer Milmore, Blythe Danner, Beth Grant, Alice Drummond, Chris Penn, Arliss Howard
Directed by: Beeban Kidron
Based on: An original screenplay written by Douglas Carter Beane.
Notes: I absolutely love this film and can watch it over and over. It’s so funny and heartwarming at the same time. And how beautiful is John Leguizamo as Chi Chi? My goodness..

Number 22

Title: The Mummy
Year: 1999
Plot: At an archaeological dig in the ancient city of Hamunaptra, an American serving in the French Foreign Legion accidentally awakens a mummy who begins to wreak havoc as he searches for the reincarnation of his long-lost love.
Starring: Brendan Fraser, Rachel Weisz, John Hannah, Arnold Vosloo, Kevin J O’Connor, Oded Fehr, Erick Avari, Jonathan Hyde, Patricia Velasquez, Omid Djalili
Directed by: Stephen Sommers
Based on: An original screenplay written by Stephen Sommers, although it is a re-imagining of the 1932 Universal film of the same name.
Notes: Is this movie really only number 22? Wow, there were great movies in this decade! This film is so fun and of course I eat up anything even remotely about ancient Egypt. And 90’s Brendan Fraser? Yes please!

Number 21

Title: Ever After
Year: 1998
Plot: Danielle de Barbarac is a spirited young woman forced into servitude by her wicked stepmother after her father’s death, who falls in love with Prince Henry after a chance meeting.
Starring: Drew Barrymore, Anjelica Huston, Dougray Scott, Melanie Lynskey, Megan Dodds, Patrick Godfrey, Lee Ingleby, Kate Lansbury, Walter Sparrow, Matyelok Gibbs, Judy Parfitt, Timothy West, Jeroen Krabbé
Directed by: Andy Tennant
Based on: An original screenplay written by Susannah Grant, Andy Tennant, and Rick Parks, inspired by the 1697 Cinderella fairy tale written by Charles Perrault.
Notes: One of my very favourite chick flicks. Such a beautiful story and stupidly romantic, Danielle is actually a good role model for women and girls to follow.

Number 20

Title: House on Haunted Hill
Year: 1999
Plot: An amusement park mogul offers a group of diverse people $1,000,000 to spend the night in a haunted house with a horrifying past.
Starring: Geoffrey Rush, Famke Janssen, Ali Larter, Taye Diggs, Peter Gallagher, Chris Kattan, Bridgette Wilson-Sampras, Max Perlich, Jeffrey Combs
Directed by: William Malone
Based on: An original screenplay written by Robb White and Dick Beebe. It is a loose remake of the 1959 movie of the same name starring Vincent Price.
Notes: Now, I love Vincent Price, but gods was the original boring! And I have trouble with plastic skeletons on wires, I’ll be honest. This remake is slick and scary, perfectly updated for modern audiences.

Number 19

Title: Stargate
Year: 1994
Plot: An Egyptologist and a retired US Army Colonel unlock an ancient ring-shaped device discovered in Giza. They travel through a wormhole to the desert planet Abydos, where they discover a human civilization enslaved by the alien Ra, who poses as a god, and work to overthrow him to return home.
Starring: James Spader, Kurt Russell, Jaye Davidson, Alexis Cruz, Mili Avital, Erick Avari, Viveca Lindfors, Leon Rippy, John Diehl, Djimon Hounsou, Gianin Loffler
Directed by: Roland Emmerich
Based on: An original screenplay written by Dean Devlin and Roland Emmerich, inspired in part by ancient astronaut theory, notably Chariots of the Gods by Erich Von Däniken.
Notes: Marrying ancient Egyptian-like culture and space travel? Sign me up! It also doesn’t hurt that James Spader was an absolute fox.

Number 18

Title: Empire Records
Year: 1995
Plot: A tight-knit group of record store employees are fighting to save their independent shop from becoming a corporate chain store in a single, chaotic day.
Starring: Anthony LaPaglia, Rory Cochrane, Liv Tyler, Johnny Whitworth, Renée Zellweger, Robin Tunney, Ethan Embry, Debi Mazar, Maxwell Caulfield, Brendan Sexton III, Coyote Shivers, James ‘Kimo’ Wills
Directed by: Allan Moyle
Based on: An original screenplay written by Carol Heikkinen, based on her personal experiences working at a Tower Records in Phoenix, Arizona.
Notes: I can’t even explain how much I love this film. I saw it when it first came out (I was 14), and I fell instantly in love with it, and have been ever since. Thankfully, it still holds up well today, and I give it a watch every once in a while, and it never fails to make me smile.

Number 17

Title: Seven
Year: 1995
Plot: Two detectives try to track down a serial killer who chooses his victims based on the seven deadly sins.
Starring: Morgan Freeman, Brad Pitt, Gwyneth Paltrow, R Lee Ermey, Richard Roundtree, Reg E Cathey, Peter Crombie, John Cassini, Kevin Spacey
Directed by: David Fincher
Based on: An original screenplay written by Andrew Kevin Walker.
Notes: Such a brilliant piece of film. Well written, well acted, with a gut-punch of an ending that will stick with you long after the movie is done.

Number 16

Title: The Silence of the Lambs
Year: 1991
Plot: A young FBI rookie is sent to ask the help of brilliant cannibalistic killer Dr Hannibal Lecter in catching another killer who kidnaps his victims, holds them for many days, then skins them to make a ‘woman suit’.
Starring: Jodie Foster, Anthony Hopkins, Scott Glenn, Ted Levine, Anthony Heald, Frankie Faison, Brooke Smith, Lawrence T Wrentz, Diane Baker
Directed by: Jonathan Demme
Based on: The book The Silence of the Lambs by Thomas Harris.
Notes: This is, quite possibly, my favourite serial killer movie of all time. No surprises there, it’s such a classic. Did you know, despite having top billing, Anthony Hopkins only has about 18 minutes of screen time?

Number 15

Title: Stigmata
Year: 1999
Plot: When a young woman becomes afflicted by stigmata, a priest is sent to investigate her case, which may have severe ramifications for his faith and for the Catholic church itself.
Starring: Patricia Arquette, Gabriel Byrne, Jonathan Pryce, Nia Long, Thomas Kopache, Enrico Colantoni, Rade Serbedzija, Dick Latessa
Directed by: Rupert Wainwright
Based on: An original screenplay written by Tom Lazarus and Rick Ramage.
Notes: My lifelong crush on Gabriel Byrne aside, this is just an awesome movie. I must have seen it over 20 times, maybe even more! I love religious horror when it’s done right.

Number 14

Title: It
Year: 1990
Plot: In 1960, seven pre-teen outcasts fight an evil demon who poses as a child-killing clown. Thirty years later, they reunite to stop the demon once and for all when it returns to their hometown.
Starring: Tim Curry, Richard Thomas, Jonathan Brandis, Annette O’Toole, Emily Perkins, Harry Anderson, Seth Green, Dennis Christopher, John Ritter
Directed by: Tommy Lee Wallace
Based on: The book It by Stephen King
Notes: I watched this when it came out, which meant I was 9 years old. Pennywise traumatized the crap out of me, and I’ve hated clowns ever since. But despite all this, I loved it and still do. Part two is not nearly as good as part one, which is why it’s not higher on the list.

Number 13

Title: Hackers
Year: 1995
Plot: Teenage hackers discover a criminal conspiracy with plans to use a computer virus that will capsize five oil tankers unless a ransom is paid.
Starring: Jonny Lee Miller, Angelina Jolie, Jesse Bradford, Matthew Lillard, Renoly Santiago, Fisher Stevens, Laurence Mason, Lorraine Bracco, Marc Anthony, Wendell Pierce, Alberta Watson
Directed by: Iain Softley
Based on: An original screenplay written by Rafael Moreu.
Notes: It was one of the first films to really get me interested in computers. And even though I was very disappointed to find out real hacking is nothing like what is shown in this film, I’ve always had my own computer since then. So much fun, so much eye candy, and to top it all off, a totally bitchin’ soundtrack.

Number 12

Title: The Crow
Year: 1994
Plot: The night before his wedding, musician Eric Draven and his fiancée are brutally murdered by members of a violent gang. On the anniversary of their death, Eric rises from the grave and assumes the mantle of the Crow, a supernatural avenger.
Starring: Brandon Lee, Michael Wincott, Rochelle Davis, Ernie Hudson, Bai Ling, Anna Thomson, David Patrick Kelly, Angel David, Laurence Mason, Michael Massee, Jon Polito, Tony Todd
Directed by: Alex Proyas
Based on: The graphic novel The Crow by James O’Barr
Notes: I’m generally not a huge fan of action movies, but this was a huge exception. With its gothic esthetic and supernatural elements, this became one of my all-time favourite movies.

Number 11

Title: Event Horizon
Year: 1997
Plot: A rescue crew is tasked with investigating the mysterious reappearance of a spaceship that had been lost for seven years. It did not come back alone.
Starring: Laurence Fishburne, Sam Neill, Joely Richardson, Kathleen Quinlan, Jason Isaacs, Jack Noseworthy, Richard T Jones, Sean Pertwee
Directed by: Paul WS Anderson
Based on: An original screenplay written by Philip Eisner.
Notes: This film scared the snot out of me when I first saw it when it came out (I was 16), and still manages to give me goosebumps today. A sign of a job well done!

Number 10

Title: The Exorcist III
Year: 1990
Plot: As a police lieutenant mourns on the anniversary of his friend’s death (Father Karras, from the first film), a serial killer strikes whose MO is eerily similar to a killer’s who’s been dead for 15 years.
Starring: George C Scott, Ed Flanders, Brad Dourif, Jason Miller, Nicol Williamson, Scott Wilson, Nancy Fish, and George DiCenzo
Directed by: William Peter Blatty
Based on: The book Legion by William Peter Blatty.
Notes: This is the only sequel that The Exorcist should of had, instead of the abomination that was made (seriously, what the hell was that??) It’s a great story, and has real scares, with none of the camp that 90’s horror was so famous for. A real, under-rated gem. It also has the best jumpscare ever.

Number 9

Title: The Stand
Year: 1994
Plot: After a man-made super flu kills 99% of the people on earth, the survivors band together into two groups, one drawn by dreams of a kind old lady, the others by an evil dark man.
Starring: Gary Sinise, Molly Ringwald, Jamey Sheridan, Adam Storke, Laura San Giacomo, Ruby Dee, Rob Lowe, Corin Nemec, Matt Frewer, Miguel Ferrer, Ray Walston
Directed by: Mick Garris
Based on: The book The Stand by Stephen King.
Notes: I saw this at 13 when it first aired on tv, and I hadn’t read the book yet, which was probably a good thing, since it allowed me to love the mini-series, and not continuously compare it to the book. When I read the book a few years later, I was amazed at how much extra stuff was in it, but my love of the show was already cemented. It’s hopelessly dated, but it’s still a fun watch.

Number 8

Title: Interview with the Vampire
Year: 1994
Plot: A man who has lost his wife and baby in childbirth is offered immortality by a charming but ruthless vampire. We follow him through his centuries of life as he tells his story to a young writer.
Starring: Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, Kirsten Dunst, Antonio Banderas, Christian Slater, Stephen Rea, Domiziana Giordano, Indra Ové, Thandie Newton
Directed by: Neil Jordan
Based on: The book Interview with a Vampire by Anne Rice.
Notes: So beautiful and sumptuous. Incredibly acted and written, it follows the book quite closely (which is to be expected when the author writes the screenplay). A lot of the actors don’t look like their book counterparts, but the movie is so well done that I was able to forgive this.

Number 7

Title: Only You
Year: 1994
Plot: As a teen, Faith was told that her destiny is with a man named Damon Bradley. Years later, when she’s about to marry someone else, a Damon Bradley calls to wish them well, and Faith blows off her wedding to follow Damon to Italy.
Starring: Marisa Tomei, Robert Downey Jr, Bonnie Hunt, Joaquim de Almeida, Fisher Stevens, Billy Zane, Adam LeFevre, Siobhan Fallon Hogan
Directed by: Norman Jewison
Based on: An original screenplay written by Malia Scotch Marmo.
Notes: Films don’t get much more schmoopy than this, folks. This is the very definition of romantic. My heart flutters a little every time I see it.

Number 6

Title: Clueless
Year: 1995
Plot: Popular, rich girls Cher and Dionne decide to take a new, frumpy student under their wing and give her a makeover, while their love lives run amok.
Starring: Alicia Silverstone, Stacey Dash, Brittany Murphy, Paul Rudd, Donald Faison, Elisa Donovan, Breckin Meyer, Jeremy Sisto, Justin Walker, Julie Brown, Twink Caplan, Wallace Shawn, Dan Hedaya
Directed by: Amy Heckerling
Based on: The book Emma by Jane Austen (loosely based).
Notes: My favourite teen movie of all time. It’s over the top and ridiculous in so many ways, but the actors are all perfect in their roles, and the film comes off as completely sweet and charming instead of grating and self-indulgent, as rich teens probably actually are.

Number 5

Title: Jurassic Park
Year: 1993
Plot: An industrialist invites some experts to visit his theme park of cloned dinosaurs. After a power failure, the creatures run loose, putting everyone’s lives, including his grandchildren’s, in danger.
Starring: Sam Neill, Laura Dern, Jeff Goldblum, Richard Attenborough, Ariana Richards, Joseph Mazzello, Bob Peck, Martin Ferrero, Samuel L Jackson, Wayne Knight, BD Wong
Directed by: Steven Spielberg
Based on: The book Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton.
Notes: The first, the original, and still the best. The effects more than hold up today.

Number 4

Title: Sleepy Hollow
Year: 1999
Plot: A slightly eccentric Constable is sent to the small town of Sleepy Hollow to investigate killings that the locals are sure were committed by a ghostly headless horseman.
Starring: Johnny Depp, Christina Ricci, Miranda Richardson, Michael Gambon, Jeffrey Jones, Casper van Dien, Richard Griffiths, Michael Gough, Marc Pickering, Lisa Marie, Ian McDiarmid, Christopher Walken
Directed by: Tim Burton
Based on: The book The Legend of Sleepy Hollow by Washington Irving.
Notes: This is Burton and Depp at their very best, when the creative mojo was still mojoing, and they were still making terrific pictures together. The scenery is dark and brooding, the characters are all captivating, and Johnny Depp is, of course, absolutely gorgeous. Simply wonderful.

Number 3

Title: The Shawshank Redemption
Year: 1994
Plot: A wrongfully convicted banker forms a close friendship with a hardened convict over a quarter century while retaining his humanity through simple acts of compassion.
Starring: Tim Robbins, Morgan Freeman, Bob Gunton, William Sadler, Clancy Brown, Gil Bellows, James Whitmore, Mark Rolston
Directed by: Frank Darabont
Based on: The novella Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption by Stephen King.
Notes: With an IMDb score of 9.3/10, I don’t really think I need to explain why this one is so good. The acting, the writing, the filming, everything is amazing. A wonderful story about the resilience of the human spirit.

Number 2

Title: The Sixth Sense
Year: 1999
Plot: After being shot by a resentful former patient whom he failed to help, a Philadelphia child psychologist seeks redemption by treating a young boy with a disturbing secret.
Starring: Bruce Willis, Haley Joel Osment, Toni Collette, Olivia Williams, Trevor Morgan, Mischa Barton, Donnie Wahlberg
Directed by: M Night Shyamalan
Based on: An original screenplay written by M Night Shyamalan
Notes: I do love me a good old haunting. I remember when I saw this for the first time, I went to see it at the cinema with my cousin. We were both so blown away by that ending, we went back to see it again right after, just to see if we could spot any mistakes that would have the twist make no sense. We couldn’t. And thankfully, unlike a lot of films with such twists, this film is so good that even knowing what’s going to happen doesn’t take any enjoyment away from the film.

Number 1

Title: Bram Stoker’s Dracula
Year: 1992
Plot: After seeing a photograph of a woman who resembles his long-dead wife, a centuries old vampire travels to England to find her.
Starring: Gary Oldman, Winona Ryder, Anthony Hopkins, Keanu Reeves, Sadie Frost, Cary Elwes, Richard E Grant, Tom Waits, Monica Bellucci
Directed by: Francis Ford Coppola
Based on: The novel Dracula by Bram Stoker.
Notes: I won’t deny the effect that the classics have had on modern film. Without the original Universal monsters, we might not have near as many great movies as we do. But it stands that I have trouble with old timey films. So I much prefer this one to the original. So lush, so beautiful, romantic, sometimes creepy. Simply put, perfect. Besides Keanu’s accent, of course! haha

And here are a few of the films that almost made the list, but not quite:

The Truth About Cats & Dogs
While You Were Sleeping
Stir of Echoes
Cruel Intentions
The Relic
From Dusk Till Dawn
The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert
10 Things I Hate About You
Twister
The Good Son
The Lion King
Get Real
The Witches
Army of Darkness
Romeo + Juliet
Little Women
Fried Green Tomatoes
Benny & Joon
The Cutting Edge
Dazed and Confused
Dark City
Total Recall
Can’t Hardly Wait
Cry-Baby
Merlin
The Frighteners
The Pit and the Pendulum
Subspecies
Darkman

And there it was, my top 30 films of the 90’s! What are some of your favourites? Let me know!

M.

Top 15 Onscreen Witches

Back in May, I posted my Top 15 Onscreen Vampires, and the response I got was good enough that I decided to continue the “series”, this time ranking witches. I’ve picked characters from all over film and tv, both male and female. For the purposes of this article, I’ve described a witch as “a human who is born with or learns magic”. I’ve included some characters who aren’t necessarily called witches (or wizards) but who have magic, and I’ve left out those characters who, despite having magic, are not now, nor have they ever been, humans, like faeries, elves, angels, demons, etc. I’ve also chosen one single character per “world”, otherwise this list would end up being a mile long.

The witches aren’t in any order except alphabetical, and, as usual, spoiler alert!! And off we go! 🙂

 

Amanda Shelton, Simply Irresistible

Amanda

“I think I’ve loved you since that first day in the market.”
“You mean the day I had my hand up your pants? Men are so easy.”

Played by: Sarah Michelle Gellar
Born in: New York City, date unknown but the movie takes place in modern times.
Scary or sexy: Sexy
Good or evil: Good
Powers: With the help of a magical crab (yup, you read that right), Amanda becomes an extraordinary chef whose emotions go into her food, causing anything from laughter to tears to even floating on the ceiling.
Weaknesses: None but her own self-confidence (or lack thereof, rather).
Alive at the end?: Yes
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: N/A

 

Bathsheba Sherman, The Conjuring

Bathsheeba

“She ran out to that tree by the dock, climbed up, proclaimed her love to Satan, cursed anyone who tried to take her land, and hung herself. Time of death was pronounced at 3:07 in the morning.”

Played by: Joseph Bishara
Born in: Rhode Island, 1812
Scary or sexy: Scary
Good or evil: Evil
Powers: Telekinesis and possession of others
Weaknesses: Holy objects, exorcism and love.
Alive at the end?: No
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: Exorcised out of Carolyn by Ed.

 

Bavmorda, Willow

Bavmorda

“Why is it with my powers and the strength of my great army you cannot so much as find one… little… child?”

Played by: Jean Marsh
Born in: Nockmaar, date unknown
Scary or sexy: Scary (Jean Marsh is a handsome woman, but her character doesn’t stay attractive for very long).
Good or evil: Evil
Powers: All kinds of dark magic, from curses to transmogrification.
Weaknesses: Arrogance, white magic and lightning
Alive at the end?: No
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: Willow tricks her into thinking he’s made little Elora disappear, and when she rushes towards him she knocks over all the components of her spell and is struck by lightning at the same time, sending her to the Netherworld she was planning on sending Elora to.

 

Gandalf, The Lord of the Rings trilogy / The Hobbit trilogy

Gandalf

“Never put it on, for then the agents of the Dark Lord will be drawn to its power. Always remember, Frodo, the Ring is trying to get back to its master. It wants to be found.”

Played by: Ian McKellan
Born in: I’m sure it’s mentioned somewhere when and where Gandalf was born, but in the interest of saving time, let’s just say he was born in Middle Earth, and leave it at that :-p
Scary or sexy: Neither, actually, but Sir Ian does cut a proud figure.
Good or evil: Good
Powers: Ability to conjure and control fire, control over water, spells and blessings, causing explosive blasts, conjure lightning, foresight abilities, some telepathic power, and the ability to communicate with animals.
Weaknesses: Trust in the wrong people, the Ring
Alive at the end?: Yes
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: N/A

 

Hermione Granger (and pretty much everyone else in the series), Harry Potter octology
(*can I patent that word? I likes it! hehe)

Hermione

“No, Harry. Even in the wizarding world, hearing voices isn’t a good sign.”

Played by: Emma Watson
Born in: England, 1979
Scary or sexy: Sexy (once she came of age, naturally :-p )
Good or evil: Good
Powers: She can do almost anything by flicking her wand, brewing a potion, or hopping on a broomstick.
Weaknesses: Endless curiosity that could get her into trouble, habit of being a know-it-all, Ron Weasley.
Alive at the end?: Yes
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: N/A

 

The Horned King, The Black Cauldron

Horned King

“Soon the Black Cauldron will be mine. Its evil power will course through my veins, and I shall make you Cauldron-born! Yes, yes. Oh, yes! Then you will worship me! Me! Oh, my soldiers. How long I have thirsted to be a god among mortal men.”

Played by: John Hurt
Born in: Prydain, date unknown
Scary or sexy: Scary
Good or evil: Evil
Powers: Necromancy, all manners of dark magic
Weaknesses: Love and sacrifice, the Black Cauldron
Alive at the end?: No
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: When Gurgi sacrificed himself by jumping into the Cauldron, all of the Cauldron-born are sucked back into it, dragging the Horned King in with them.

 

Jareth, Labyrinth

Jareth

“I ask for so little. Just fear me, love me, do as I say and I will be your slave!”

Played by: David Bowie
Born in: Unknown
Scary or sexy: Sexy
Good or evil: Evil(ish)
Powers: Shape-shifting, slowing and speeding up time, master of illusions, some clairvoyance through his crystals, the ability to conjure things from nothing.
Weaknesses: Arrogance, Sarah
Alive at the end?: Yes
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: N/A

 

Lamia, Stardust

Lamia

“You shall not see the star, touch it, smell or hear it. You will not perceive her even if she stands before you. Pray you never meet me again.”

Played by: Michelle Pfeiffer
Born in: Kingdom of Stormhold, date unknown but she and her sisters are described as ‘centuries old’.
Scary or sexy: Both
Good or evil: Evil
Powers: Pretty much anything, from transfiguration to conjuration and the animation of dead bodies.
Weaknesses: Love
Alive at the end?: No
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: With Tristan in her arms, Yvaine lets her love for him shine, and her pure light disintegrates Lamia.

 

Melisandre, Game of Thrones

Melisandre

“Death is coming for everyone and everything. A darkness that will swallow the dawn.”

Played by: Carice van Houten
Born in: Asshai, year unknown
Scary or sexy: Sexy
Good or evil: I think the character was meant to be more ambiguous than straight good or evil, but mo matter what good comes from helping Stannis is deeply over-shadowed by the horrible things she does. In her case, the ends don’t justify the means, and burning folks alive is just plain evil.
Powers: Clairvoyance, dark magic, giving “birth” to shadow demons, immunity to (at least some) poisons.
Weaknesses: Arrogance, religious fanaticism
Alive at the end?: As of where I am in the show (end of season 3), yes. I’ve read all the books, but I won’t spoil it for those who haven’t read yet, or who are waiting after the show.
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: N/A

 

Merlin, various films and tv shows

Merlin

“I’m gone, but then, I’m not gone. So if I do leave, you can never be sure that I am gone, can you?”

Played by: Various actors, including Karl Swenson, Sam Neill, Joseph Fiennes, and Colin Morgan
Born in: England, date unknown
Scary or sexy: He’s not scary, but usually he’s portrayed as an old man, so he’s not really sexy either.
Good or evil: Good
Powers: Various or none, depending which movie or show you’re watching, but they can range from everything from transforming himself into animals, to casting illusions, and much more.
Weaknesses: Again depends on the film, but he’s often shown as having had trusted the wrong people, and is betrayed.
Alive at the end?: In everything I’ve seen him in, yes.
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: N/A

 

Winifred Sanderson (and her sisters), Hocus Pocus

Sanderson sisters

“My ungodly book speaks to you. On All Hallow’s Eve, when the moon is round, a virgin will summon us from under the ground. We shall be back, and the lives of all the children of Salem will be mine!”

Played by: Bette Midler, Sarah Jessica Parker, and Kathy Najimy
Born in: Salem. They were executed in 1693, but it’s unclear how long they’d been alive before then. I’m assuming a lot.
Scary or sexy: Neither. They’re pretty funny-looking, actually.
Good or evil: Evil
Powers: Various dark magic spells, including transforming children into animals, cursing hundreds of people at once, and sucking out the life-force of children to keep their youth.
Weaknesses: Hanging, fire, holy ground
Alive at the end?: No
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: While trying to suck out Max’s essence, the witches accidentally end up on hallowed ground, and the first rays of dawn’s light disintegrates them.

 

Sally and Gillian Owens, Practical Magic

Sally & Gillian

“Witch! Witch! You’re a bitch! Witch! Witch! You’re a bitch!”
“You’d think after three hundred years they’d come up with a better rhyme!”

Played by: Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman
Born in: The States (not sure which one), exact date unknown, but I imagine it was some time in the 70’s.
Scary or sexy: Sexy
Good or evil: Good
Powers: Love spells, healing spells, some clairvoyance, and many other spells.
Weaknesses: A long standing family curse that any man who loves an Owens woman will die young.
Alive at the end?: Yes
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: N/A

 

Ursula, The Little Mermaid

Ursula

“Oh, no, no, no, no, no! I can’t stand it! It’s too easy! The child is in love with a human! And not just any human. A prince! [laughs] Her daddy’ll love that. King Triton’s headstrong, lovesick girl would make a charming addition to my little garden.

Played by: Pat Carroll
Born in: Atlantica, year unknown
Scary or sexy: Scary
Good or evil: Evil
Powers: Various dark spells, the ability to turn merfolk (including herself) into humans (or better looking merfolk), able to see whatever her familiars see, no matter the distance.
Weaknesses: None save arrogance, and, I guess, being impaled :-p
Alive at the end?: No
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: After growing to an enormous size, Eric is able to steer the ship right towards her, and the broken mast goes right through her breast as she’s struck by lightning. She wraps her huge tentacles around the broken ship, and sinks to the ocean floor, dead.

 

The Warlock, Warlock and Warlock: The Armageddon

Warlock

“Of all the curiosities here I’ve seen, none have surprised me more than this.”

Played by: Julian Sands
Born in: Boston, year unknown (he was slated to be executed in 1691 when he escaped to the present time, but it’s unknown how old her really is).
Scary or sexy: Sexy
Good or evil: Evil
Powers: Dark curses, flight, jumping through time, and more.
Weaknesses: Nails pounded into his foot prints, salt
Alive at the end?: No
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: Kassandra injects him full of salt water, and he bursts into flames. He is reborn in the sequel, but is vanquished again, this time being stabbed by a knife made from the same material as the Holy Grail.

 

Willow Rosenberg, Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Willow

“I’ll give Xander a call. What’s his number? Oh yeah, 1-800-I’m-Dating-A-Skanky-Ho.”
“Meow!”
“Really? Thanks! I’ve never gotten a ‘meow’ before.”

Played by: Alyson Hannigan
Born in: Sunnydale California, 1981
Scary or sexy: Sexy
Good or evil: Good (except for a handful of episodes in season 6)
Powers: Pretty much everything one can think of.
Weaknesses: Addiction to the magics, fear of going bad again, Tara
Alive at the end?: Yes
If not, how did (s)he bite it, and by whom?: N/A

 

And here, a few honourable mentions:

The Grand High Witch (The Witches)
Sarah and Nancy (The Craft)
Mombi (Return to Oz)
Lady van Tassell (Sleepy Hollow)
Aleesa (Silent Hill)
Claudia Hoffman (Snow White: A Tale of Terror)
Yzma (The Emperor’s New Groove)

And that’s my witchy list!! Which witch is your favourite? Let me know in the comments, and stay tuned for more! 🙂

M.

The Lovey-Dovey Twelve (aka, My Favourite Chick Flicks)

So I’d been thinking of doing a “best of 2013” kind of thing, but I honestly don’t think I’ve seen enough new stuff to merit a whole list. I’ve got a bad habit of letting my stuff to watch pile up, so I’m usually years behind. This year, for example, I’ve only seen 4 or 5 films in the cinema. I love going, but not all the films I want to see play in english here, and I refuse to see dubbed films. So, anyways, all that to say that my “best of 2013” list would be too short, so I decided to not make one, and just go on with my regular programming, hehe.

Chick flicks. They’re usually either really good, or really crappy. There doesn’t seem to be a middle ground with these films. A good one will make you feel all fuzzy and schmoopy, while a bad one will usually just make you roll your eyes, and occasionally wonder if the film makers really think their target audience is that stupid. I do love a good chick flick though, under that shell of horror lover, there’s a closet romantic. So I’ve put together a list of the 12 chick flicks that I love the most. I’ve put them in order, but honestly the “points” separating the films are few, so while they’re ordered 1 to 12, it would probably be closer to three 4-way ties, or something of the sort. I’ve also kept the list to “adult” chick flicks. Teen flicks like Clueless, Pretty in Pink or 10 Things I Hate About You would definitely fit into this list too, but I’ve left all the teen films out, so if it takes place in or around a high school, it’s not here. Maybe I’ll make another post sometime for the teen flicks. But until then, here are my dozen favourite chick flicks.

 

12 – While You Were Sleeping
(1995) Sandra Bullock, Bill Pullman, Peter Gallagher, Peter Boyle and Jack Warden

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Lucy is a lonely subway worker who admires a handsome regular traveller, Peter, from afar. One morning she sees him get mugged and pushed onto the tracks, unconscious. Without thinking, she jumps onto the tracks and pulls him to safety. At the hospital, a misunderstanding leads Peter’s family to think that Lucy is not only the woman who saved his life, but his fiancée as well. Taken in by the family, Lucy goes along with the charade because she’s tired of being so lonely. But things get complicated when she starts to fall for Peter’s handsome brother, Jack, and Peter himself wakes up. This film is just so sweet, you can’t help but love it. The characters are all so real, and you can really feel poor Lucy’s plight. It’s not anything really that special, but it somehow just sticks with you in the long run, and it’s been a favourite of mine since I first saw it.

 

11 – Center Stage
(2000) Amanda Schull, Zoe Saldana, Ethan Stiefel, Susan May Pratt, Sascha Radetsky and Peter Gallagher

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I love dancing films. Even the crappy ones I tend to enjoy more than I should. But it’s even better when the whole movie is awesome as well, and not just cool for the dance scenes, like so many of them are. Center Stage is dancing film at it’s very best. Jody is a young dancer whose dream is to be accepted to the American Ballet Academy, and then be offered a position dancing for the company. The first part of her dream comes true, and she goes hard to work trying to please her teachers, and falls hard for the handsome new choreographer. She strives to become the best dancer she can, despite her “imperfect” feet, and she makes friendships that will last a lifetime. I love how real the characters are in this film. So many chick flicks have such totally implausible scenarios (but we love them anyways, don’t we ladies?), but this one is completely believable. And the dancing, of course, is stunning. They hired actual ballet dancers, so the dancing is all real and seamless, not chopped up and edited to look like it’s all the same person doing the dancing (but you can always tell it’s not). Not on this list, but still very much worth your time, is the sequel: Center Stage, Turn It Up.

 

10 – The Truth About Cats & Dogs
(1996) Janeane Garofalo, Uma Thurman, Ben Chaplin, Jamie Foxx and Hank the Dog

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Abby and Noelle are best friends who live in the same building. Noelle is a beautiful model, but is rather dumb, and Abby, while not an obvious beauty, is brilliant, and has a radio talk show about animals called, you guessed it, The Truth About Cats & Dogs. She gets a caller one day asking for help getting a very upset, very large dog out of roller skates. After successful removal, the caller, Brian, asks if he could meet her to say thanks in person. She, being very insecure about her looks, goes ahead and gives her description… of Noelle. But when she sees him, she immediately falls for him, and spends most of her evenings on the phone with him. But when they meet in person, she sends Noelle in her place. I fear I’m not explaining this very well, and I think I’m making it sound more complicated than it is, but trust me, if you haven’t seen it and love chick flicks like I do, run out and get this one right away. It’s a definite winner, so sweet and romantic, and Ben Chaplin is a total hunnie, especially with that accent.

 

9 – Romeo + Juliet
(1996) Leonardo DiCaprio, Claire Danes, John Leguizamo, Harold Perrineau, Pete Postlethwaite and Paul Rudd

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Ah, Leo. I was 15 when this film came out, and, like all the other girls, I was gaga over Leo, and this movie just solidified his standing as “ultimate heartthrob” of the 90’s. The way the movie was made, it could have just been campy and ridiculous, but thankfully they hired actors who can actually act, and it made it the best version, in my opinion anyways, of Romeo and Juliet ever put on film. I’m sure I don’t need to go over the synopsis, even those who have never seen the films nor even read the play still know what it’s about. So, instead, just scroll up and gaze lovingly at Leo for a minute or two. It’ll make your day just a little brighter :-p

 

8 – Little Women
(1994) Winona Ryder, Susan Sarandon, Christian Bale, Trini Alvarado, Gabriel Byrne, Claire Danes, Kirsten Dunst and Samantha Mathis

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You would think something like this would be boring, because nothing really happens, but it’s not. It’s just, simply, life. Jo and her family (three sisters and their mother, father’s away at war) have fallen on some hard times. The story follows them as they grow, go to school, find work and fall in love. The movie looks gorgeous and is wonderfully acted, I especially love Gabriel Byrne, and we’re treated to a slightly geeky looking pre-fame Christian Bale. If you like sumptuous period pieces and don’t mind a slowly paced film, then this is for you. Get the kleenex out, though, this one’s a tear-jerker!

 

7 – Fried Green Tomatoes
(1991) Kathy Bates, Mary Stuart Masterson, Mary-Louise Parker, Jessica Tandy, Cicely Tyson and Stan Shaw

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Another simple story of a lifelong friendship between two women, the fiery and wild Idgie and the calmer and grounded Ruth. After loosing her brother (and Ruth’s fiancée), Idgie and Ruth’s bond becomes unbreakable, and the women open a café together that soon becomes the heart of their small town. Things get rough when Ruth’s abusive ex-husband comes around looking for her and his son, but when times get tough is when you see that family means more than just blood. Kleenex will also be needed here, lots of it. Damn that duck story…

 

6 – Benny & Joon
(1993) Johnny Depp, Mary Stuart Masterson, Aidan Quinn, Julianne Moore, CCH Pounder and Oliver Platt

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Joon is a mentally ill young woman who lives with her over-protective older brother, Benny. Benny is advised by Joon’s doctor that she should be in a home for the mentally ill, but Benny refuses to send her away, preferring instead to get home care. Benny is at the end of his rope, however, after Joon drives away yet another caretaker, and he’s not sure what to do any more. That’s when Joon “wins” Sam, an eccentric young man, in a poker game. Sam comes to live with them and he assumes the role as Joon caretaker. At least, that’s how Benny sees it. For Sam and Joon, it’s an opportunity for love, an opportunity neither has had before. This film is so sweet and so quirky, it’s impossible not to love it. Sam and Joon have such chemistry onscreen, and all the acting is amazing, so much more than your typical chick flick. And, of course, Johnny Depp is a joy to watch, both for his stellar acting and his dreamy looks.

 

5 – Practical Magic
(1998) Sandra Bullock, Nicole Kidman, Stockard Channing, Dianne Wiest, Aidan Quinn and Goran Visnjic

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Sally and GIllian Owens are witches. Ask anyone in town, and they’ll tell you stories of the long line of Owens witches. After her husband dies, Sally goes back home to live with her two aunts with her two daughters, who she vows will never do magic. She’s convinced that her husband was killed by the “Owens curse”, and doesn’t want her children to share her fate. Gillian, in her travels, meets a heartthrob called Jimmy, who, as it turns out, is a serial killer. Sally races to her sister’s rescue, but is unable to get her away in time, and after much fuss, Jimmy ends up dead in their car. A handsome cop comes around, hunting for Jimmy, and Sally feels that old stirring of love in her heart again. This is such an amazing film, everything is perfect. I keep on meaning to read the book, but I always end up picking something else instead. But I hear it’s quite different from the movie, so maybe it’s best if I didn’t read it, since I adore the film so much.

 

4 – Moonstruck
(1987) Cher, Nicolas Cage, Olympia Dukakis, Vincent Gardenia, Danny Aiello and John Mahoney

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Loretta is a 38 year old widow who lives in Brooklyn with her parents, grandfather and a crap load of dogs. She’s been dating a man, Johnny, for several years, and accepts when he proposes marriage. Loretta doesn’t love him, but that’s a good thing, her mother assures her, because “when you love them, they drive you crazy, cause they know they can”. Johnny has to fly home to Italy to be with his dying mother, but says that once she’s dead he’ll come home to marry her, which should be no longer than a month. As he’s leaving he asks her to contact his younger brother, Ronnie, who he hasn’t seen in years, to invite him to the wedding.When Loretta goes to Ronnie, she finds a young, turbulent man whose hand was sliced off in an accident. Loretta finds herself drawn to this man, and, after a night of passion, they’re deeply in love. I absolutely love this film. Cher is wonderful (and disgustingly beautiful) as Loretta, and Nicolas Cage is, well, young, hehe. But what I especially love about the film (or love the film despite of, depending on how you see it) is that everything is just so… damn… dramatic! Lots of heavy sighs and raised arms, it may be a caricature of Italians, but it’s a darn entertaining one.

 

3 – Only You
(1994) Marisa Tomei, Robert Downey Jr, Bonnie Hunt, Joaquim de Almeida, Fisher Stevens and Billy Zane

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Stupidly romantic, this film is what solidified Robert Downey Jr as my favourite actor. As a teen, Faith and her friends play with a Ouija board. When asked who her soulmate was, the board told Faith it was someone named Damon Bradley. A few months later, a fortune teller tells her the same thing. Fast forward ten years, and Faith is a young teacher, engaged to be married to a podiatrist. A phone call is about to upset her whole life, though, as she writes down the name of the caller: Damon Bradley. She absolutely looses her shit (that’s the technical term) and decides to follow Damon to Venice, to see if he really is her soulmate. Films don’t get much more schmoopy than this, folks. This is the very definition of romantic. My heart flutters a little every time I see it.

 

2 – Ever After
(1998) Drew Barrymore, Anjelica Huston, Dougray Scott, Megan Dodds, Melanie Lynskey and Patrick Godfrey

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A retelling of the classic Cinderella story, perfectly done. Danielle is a hard working young woman whose stepmother, after her father dies, treats her like one of the servants instead of like her own daughters. Danielle accidentally meets the prince, Henry, while she’s attempting to free another servant from being shipped off to the Americas. Henry takes a fancy to her, believing her to be a courtesan, and starts to court her. Danielle, having felt the same attraction, keeps up the charade to be with him, but her scheming stepmother has other plans: she wants her own daughter, the beautiful but horrible Marguerite, to marry Henry, not Danielle. The Cinderella story has never had such a glorious treatment, not before nor since. If you haven’t seen it, I strongly recommend it.

 

1 – The Princess Bride
(1987) Cary Elwes, Mandy Patinkin, Robin Wright, Chris Sarandon, André the Giant, Christopher Guest, Wallace Shawn and Billy Crystal

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And, of course, the chick flick to beat all chick flicks is the fantastic The Princess Bride. The plot is a little twisty-turny, so I won’t go into it too much, but it’s wonderful. It’s got action, suspense, revenge and lots and lots of schmoop. Long story short, a man has to save his beloved from an evil prince who wants to use her to start a war. There’s lots more to it, but that’s the basic thing. Anyone who doesn’t like this film simply has no heart. That is all. Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die. Oh yeah.

 

And that rounds up my list. There are a bunch more awesome films that were thisclose to being on the list, but in the end these ones on the list were just a little better. But here, in no particular order, are the honourable mentions:
Dirty Dancing
Pretty Woman
Steel Magnolias
Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day
Some Like It Hot
Wimbledon
Josie and the Pussycats
Simply Irresistible
The Cutting Edge
Three to Tango
Splash
Blow Dry
Waitress
Miss Congeniality
Ghost
I realize there are more titles in the honourable mentions than in the actual list, but oh well. Just pretend that all these films are tied for 13th place, hehe.

So what do you think? Are your favourite chick flicks here? Did I forget something? Let me know in the comments, and stay tuned for more! 🙂

M.