My Top 30 Films of the 2010’s

The 2010’s saw a significant decline in the number of movies and shows I was watching. I was mostly watching science, history, and nature documentaries at this time. But I still managed to watch some bangers, so here are the 30 best films I saw in the 2010’s.

Number 30

Title: Before I Wake
Year: 2016
Plot: After tragically losing their own son, a man and his wife welcome an eight-year-old foster child into their lives, and soon discover he has a strange ability.
Starring: Kate Bosworth, Thomas Jane, Jacob Tremblay, Annabeth Gish, Topher Bousquet, Dash Mihok
Directed by: Mike Flanagan
Based on: An original screenplay written by Mike Flanagan and Jeff Howard.
Notes: After seeing The Haunting of Hill House, I decided that Mike Flanagan was the one to watch, and promptly watched almost everything he did from that point on. Before I Wake is just a lovely dark fairy tale with just enough creep in it to call it a horror movie.

Number 29

Title: The Blackcoat’s Daughter
Year: 2015
Plot: During winter break, two students stay in an all-girls boarding school in the company of a terrifying presence.
Starring: Emma Roberts, Kiernan Shipka, Lucy Boynton, James Remar, Lauren Holly, Greg Ellwand, Elana Krausz, Heather Tod Mitchell
Directed by: Osgood Perkins
Based on: An original screenplay written by Osgood Perkins.
Notes: Oz Perkins (son of the legendary Anthony Perkins) is definitely another one to watch, at least some of the time. I’ve seen only 3 of his films, but have loved 2 of them (I am the Pretty Thing that Lives in the House is a total snore-fest). They’re twisty-turny, and you’re never quite sure where he’s going with the story. I’ve been meaning to watch his 4 other films, but haven’t gotten around to it yet.

Number 28

Title: World War Z
Year: 2013
Plot: Former United Nations employee Gerry Lane traverses the world in a race against time to stop a zombie pandemic that is toppling armies and governments and threatens to destroy humanity itself.
Starring: Brad Pitt, Mireille Enos, Daniella Kertesz, James Badge Dale, Ludi Boeken, Matthew Fox, Fana Mokoena, David Morse, Peter Capaldi
Directed by: Marc Forster
Based on: The book World War Z written by Max Brooks.
Notes: Now, I never read the book this film is based on. I’ve been told that had I read it, this movie would have insulted me. As it is, I found it a fun, popcorny good time.

Number 27

Title: Eli
Year: 2019
Plot: A boy receiving treatment for his auto-immune disorder discovers that the house he’s living in isn’t as safe as he thought.
Starring: Charlie Shotwell, Kelly Reilly, Max Martini, Lili Taylor, Sadie Sink, Deneen Tyler, Katia Gomez
Directed by: Ciarán Foy
Based on: An original screenplay written by David Chirchirillo.
Notes: This one surprised me. I thought I was in for a standard haunted house fare, which isn’t a bad thing, but then it flipped the switch and became something totally unexpected. Quite a good little film. Even my boyfriend liked it, and he doesn’t do horror.

Number 26

Title: Ouija: Origin of Evil
Year: 2016
Plot: In 1967 Los Angeles, a young girl tries to communicate with her late father through a Ouija board, but unleashes a demon instead.
Starring: Elizabeth Reaser, Lulu Wilson, Annalise Basso, Henry Thomas, Parker Mack, Halle Charlton, Alexis G Zall, Doug Jones
Directed by: Mike Flanagan
Based on: An original screenplay written by Mike Flanagan and Jeff Howard.
Notes: There’s some really bad cgi in this, but on the whole it’s really quite good. So much better than the first Ouija film. Mike Flanagan was really starting to show what an awesome filmmaker he is here. The Haunting of Hill House came soon after, and that show just blew me away.

Number 25

Title: The Innkeepers
Year: 2011
Plot: During the final days at the Yankee Pedlar Inn, two employees determined to reveal the hotel’s haunted past begin to experience disturbing events as old guests check in for a stay.
Starring: Sara Paxton, Pat Healy, Kelly McGillis, Alison Bartlett, Jake Ryan
Directed by: Ti West
Based on: An original screenplay written by Ti West, based on his real-life experiences at the supposedly haunted Yankee Pedlar Inn.
Notes: This is definitely a slow burn, but unlike West’s other film House of the Devil, this one actually goes somewhere. There’s a nice, creepy atmosphere, an empty hotel is always a good choice for a haunting.

Number 24

Title: The Vatican Tapes
Year: 2015
Plot: A priest and two Vatican exorcists must do battle with an ancient satanic force to save the soul of a young woman.
Starring: Olivia Taylor Dudley, Michael Peña, Dougray Scott, John Patrick Amedori, Peter Andersson, Djimon Hounsou, Kathleen Robertson
Directed by: Mark Neveldine
Based on: An original screenplay written by Christopher Borrelli and Michael C Martin.
Notes: I wasn’t expecting much when I pulled this out of the bargain bin at WalMart. Imagine my surprise when I actually loved it! No, it doesn’t reinvent the wheel, but it’s a fun, creepy good time.

Number 23

Title: Legion
Year: 2010
Plot: An out-of-the-way diner becomes the unlikely battleground for the survival of the human race. When God loses faith in humankind, he sends his legion of angels to bring on the Apocalypse. Humanity’s only hope lies in a group of strangers trapped in a desert diner with the fallen Archangel Michael.
Starring: Paul Bettany, Dennis Quaid, Adrianne Palicki, Charles S Dutton, Lucas Black, Tyrese Gibson, Kevin Durand, Doug Jones
Directed by: Scott Stewart
Based on: An original screenplay written by Scott Stewart and Peter Schink.
Notes: A great idea executed very well, besides a little bit of questionable cgi. And how hot was Paul Bettany in this era? Whew! fans self

Number 22

Title: Evil Dead
Year: 2013
Plot: Five friends head to a remote cabin to help one of them get clean, where the discovery of a Book of the Dead leads them to unwittingly summon up demons living in the nearby woods.
Starring: Jane Levy, Shiloh Fernandez, Jessica Lucas, Lou Taylor Pucci, Elizabeth Blackmore
Directed by: Fede Alvarez
Based on: An original screenplay written by Fede Alvarez and Rodo Sayagues, which is a soft reboot of the film The Evil Dead written and directed by Sam Raimi.
Notes: I loved this film, but I will probably never watch it again. The gore is much more gory than I usually like it, but they did a really good job with this film. I hated the original, so I was hesitant to see this one, but was pleasantly surprised to see that all the silliness of the original was gone, replaced by a dour, bleak atmosphere.

Number 21

Title: Europa Report
Year: 2013
Plot: An international crew of astronauts undertakes a privately funded mission to search for life on Jupiter’s fourth largest moon.
Starring: Sharlto Copley, Michael Nyqvist, Christian Camargo, Embeth Davidtz, Daniel Wu, Karolina Wydra, Anamaria Marinca, Isiah Whitlock Jr
Directed by: Sebastián Cordero
Based on: An original screenplay written by Philip Gelatt.
Notes: Some minor technical issues aside, this film is refreshingly accurate when it comes to science fiction. There was a great attention to detail, and it paid off. Very well done.

Number 20

Title: The Void
Year: 2016
Plot: Shortly after delivering a patient to an understaffed hospital, a police officer experiences strange and violent occurrences seemingly linked to a group of mysterious hooded figures.
Starring: Aaron Poole, Kathleen Munroe, Ellen Wong, Kenneth Welsh, Art Hindle, Stephanie Belding, James Millington
Directed by: Jeremy Gillespie, Steven Kostanski
Based on: An original screenplay written by Steven Kostanski and Jeremy Gillespie, although they were heavily inspired by HP Lovecraft’s Cthulhu Mythos.
Notes: When cosmic horror is done right, it can be really awesome. When done wrong, it’s silly and dumb. This movie falls into the former category. So good. And the practical effects were really great. It’s always good to see filmmakers who don’t rely too heavily on cgi.

Number 19

Title: Insidious
Year: 2010
Plot: Josh and Renai Lambert move into their new home with their three children. As a mysterious accident leaves their boy, Dalton, in a science-defying coma for months, blood-chilling occurrences in the house can only mean one thing: something evil has set its sights on robbing the Lamberts of what they hold dear.
Starring: Patrick Wilson, Rose Byrne, Ty Simpkins, Lin Shaye, Leigh Whannell, Angus Sampson, Barbara Hershey, Joseph Bishara
Directed by: James Wan
Based on: An original screenplay written by Leigh Whannell.
Notes: A creepy story written by Leigh Whannell, masterfully directed by James Wan, and a moody-ass, string-heavy score by Joseph Bishara, there was no way this film was going to be bad. I did find the last 20 minutes or so a little silly, but it was still very well done.

Number 18

Title: Incarnate
Year: 2016
Plot: A scientist with the ability to enter the subconscious minds of the possessed must save a young boy from the grips of a demon with powers never seen before, while facing the horrors of his past.
Starring: Aaron Eckhart, Carice van Houten, David Mazouz, Catalina Sandino Moreno, Keir O’Donnell, Matt Nable, Emily Jackson, Paul Vincent O’Connor
Directed by: Brad Peyton
Based on: An original screenplay written by Ronnie Christensen.
Notes: I never see anyone talk about this movie, and it’s a damned shame. The idea is so good, I’m surprised I haven’t seen more like this. Aaron Eckhart was great as the broken scientist who’s still doing good in the world despite himself.

Number 17

Title: A Quiet Place
Year: 2018
Plot: A family struggles for survival in a world invaded by blind alien creatures with ultra-sensitive hearing.
Starring: Emily Blunt, John Krasinski, Millicent Simmonds, Noah Jupe, Cade Woodward
Directed by: John Krasinski
Based on: An original screenplay written by Bryan Woods, Scott Beck, and John Krasinski.
Notes: Such a great idea and executed almost perfectly. Even the cgi aliens didn’t bother me so much, they were really well done.

Number 16

Title: Star Trek Into Darkness
Year: 2013
Plot: After the crew of the Enterprise find an unstoppable force of terror from within their own organization, Captain Kirk leads a manhunt to a war-zone world to capture a one-man weapon of mass destruction.
Starring: Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto, Zoe Saldaña, Karl Urban, Simon Pegg, John Cho, Benedict Cumberbatch, Anton Yelchin, Bruce Greenwood, Leonard Nimoy
Directed by: JJ Abrams
Based on: An original screenplay written by Roberto Orci, Alex Kurtzman, and Damon Lindelof. Based on characters created by Gene Roddenberry.
Notes: I know I’m probably in the minority here, but I really loved this movie. It’s just a fun, action packed good time. Now, would I have loved it as much without Benedict? Hm, hard to say…

Number 15

Title: Devil
Year: 2010
Plot: A group of strangers are trapped in an elevator while a detective watches them via the elevator’s security cameras. Soon it becomes clear that they aren’t alone in there, and they begin dying, one by one.
Starring: Chris Messina, Logan Marshall-Green, Caroline Dhavernas, Bokeem Woodbine, Jenny O’Hara, Bojana Novakovic, Geoffrey Arend, Jacob Vargas, Matt Craven
Directed by: John Erick Dowdle
Based on: An original screenplay written by M Night Shyamalan and Brian Nelson.
Notes: Another one that doesn’t get talked about enough. Such a simple premise, but it’s executed flawlessly. It’s always a gamble to have your entire film set in one location, but this was never boring.

Number 14

Title: Winter’s Tale
Year: 2014
Plot: One night in winter, Peter Lake, orphan and master-mechanic, attempts to rob a fortress-like mansion on the Upper West Side. Though he thinks the house is empty, the daughter of the house is home. Thus begins the love between Peter and Beverly Penn, a young lady who is dying.
Starring: Colin Farrell, Jessica Brown Findlay, Russell Crowe, William Hurt, Jennifer Connelly, Ripley Sobo, Scott Grimes, Graham Greene, Kevin Durand, Finn Wittrock, Will Smith, Novelisto D (Listo) the Horse
Directed by: Akiva Goldsman
Based on: The book Winter’s Tale written by Mark Helprin.
Notes: Movies don’t get much more schmoopy than this, folks. Disgustingly romantic, filmed beautifully, with a haunting score by Hans Zimmer, this movie is simply beautiful. And bring a whole box of Kleenex. You’re gonna need it!

Number 13

Title: Sinister
Year: 2012
Plot: A controversial true-crime writer finds a box of Super 8 home movies in his new home, revealing that the murder case he is currently researching could be the work of an unknown serial killer whose legacy dates back to the 1960s.
Starring: Ethan Hawke, Juliet Rylance, Michael Hall D’Addario, Clare Foley, James Ransone, Vincent D’Onofrio, Fred Thompson, Nicholas King
Directed by: Scott Derrickson
Based on: An original screenplay written by Scott Derrickson and C Robert Cargill.
Notes: This movie got a 6.8 on IMDb, which is amazing for a horror film. Ethan Hawke gives an amazing performance under Scott Derrickson’s masterful direction. It was a match made in heaven.

Number 12

Title: The Cabin in the Woods
Year: 2011
Plot: Five young people visit a remote cabin and explore its cellar, finding strange items. When Dana reads from a book there, she unleashes zombie killers. But the situation is more complex than it appears.
Starring: Kristen Connolly, Chris Hemsworth, Anna Hutchison, Fran Kranz, Jesse Williams, Richard Jenkins, Bradley Whitford, Brian White, Amy Acker, Tom Lenk, Dan Payne, Jodelle Ferland
Directed by: Drew Goddard
Based on: An original screenplay written by Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard.
Notes: I had no intention of seeing this film after watching the trailer. Meh, I thought, another teen slasher, no thanks. But then I saw it: “written by Joss Whedon”. And that changed everything. I was already a huge fan of his from Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel, so I had to see it. And boy, am I glad I did. This movie is the perfect balance of comedy and horror, and the idea is just so damn good. Sure, Joss Whedon is a piece of shit, but he knows how to write!

Number 11

Title: The Autopsy of Jane Doe
Year: 2016
Plot: Sheriff Burke delivers an unidentified body to Tommy and Austin Tilden. As they perform an autopsy, impossible discoveries emerge. Each new finding deepens a mystery that threatens their survival.
Starring: Brian Cox, Emile Hirsch, Olwen Catherine Kelly, Ophelia Lovibond, Michael McElhatton, Sydney the Cat
Directed by: André Øvredal
Based on: An original screenplay written by Ian Goldberg and Richard Naing.
Notes: I had to wait so long to watch this film because it wasn’t available on any platform in Canada. Finally, I was able to buy it on YouTube, and let me tell you, it was worth all the trouble. This film is tense from start to finish, each new layer more interesting than the next.

Number 10

Title: Warm Bodies
Year: 2013
Plot: After a highly unusual zombie saves a still-living girl from an attack, the two form a relationship that sets in motion events that might transform the entire lifeless world.
Starring: Nicholas Hoult, Teresa Palmer, John Malkovich, Analeigh Tipton, Rob Corddry, Dave Franco, Cory Hardrict
Directed by: Jonathan Levine
Based on: The book Warm Bodies written by Isaac Marion, with some inspiration taken from William Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet.
Notes: Parts funny, parts romantic, and parts tense, this film really delivers. Anyone saying it’s just Twilight with zombies has obviously never seen the film. The book is also good, albeit a bit darker.

Number 9

Title: Warcraft
Year: 2016
Plot: As an Orc horde invades Azeroth using a magic portal, a few human heroes and dissenting Orcs must attempt to stop the true evil behind this war.
Starring: Travis Fimmel, Paula Patton, Dominic Cooper, Toby Kebbell (v.o.), Ben Schnetzer, Ben Foster, Robert Kazinsky (v.o.), Ruth Negga, Daniel Wu (v.o.), Clancy Brown (v.o.), Anna Galvin (v.o.), Callum Keith Rennie, Burkely Duffield
Directed by: Duncan Jones
Based on: The Warcraft game series created by Blizzard Entertainment.
Notes: As an avid player of World of Warcraft, I was super excited when this was announced. I waited with bated breath and when it finally came out, I went to see it on opening night, which I never do. And it did not disappoint. Besides engaging characters and clever dialog, this film looks beautiful. I generally don’t like when there’s too much cgi, but they really spared no expense making this movie, and you can see it. The Orcs look absolutely stunning, and the magic is suitably showy. Just wonderful.

Number 8

Title: The Avengers
Year: 2012
Plot: Earth’s mightiest heroes must come together and learn to fight as a team if they are going to stop the mischievous Loki and his alien army from enslaving humanity.
Starring: Robert Downey Jr, Chris Evans, Scarlett Johansson, Mark Ruffalo, Chris Hemsworth, Jeremy Renner, Tom Hiddleston, Clark Gregg, Cobie Smulders, Stellan Skarsgård, Samuel L Jackson, Gwyneth Paltrow, Paul Bettany (v.o.)
Directed by: Joss Whedon
Based on: The comic book series The Avengers created by Stan Lee for Marvel Comics.
Notes: Before superhero fatigue set in, I was all about the Marvel films, and this first Avengers movie remains the best of them. Written and directed by Joss Whedon, it’s a fun, quippy, action packed good time.

Number 7

Title: Dracula Untold
Year: 2014
Plot: As his kingdom is being threatened by the Turks, young prince Vlad Tepes must become a monster feared by his own people in order to obtain the power needed to protect his family, and the families of his kingdom.
Starring: Luke Evans, Dominic Cooper, Sarah Gadon, Art Parkinson, Charles Dance, Diarmaid Murtagh, Paul Kaye, William Houston, Noah Huntley
Directed by: Gary Shore
Based on: A character from the book Dracula written by Bram Stoker (origin story).
Notes: Absolutely wonderful. They did a great job with the origin story of Dracula as Vlad the Impaler. I very much doubt he was as loving and kind as he was portrayed in the film, but that’s besides the point. My only gripe with the film is Dominic Cooper, who’s quite white, as a Turk. Other than that, it’s almost perfect.

Number 6

Title: The Martian
Year: 2015
Plot: An astronaut stranded on Mars must rely on his ingenuity to survive and arrange a potential rescue.
Starring: Matt Damon, Jessica Chastain, Kristen Wiig, Jeff Daniels, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Sean Bean, Michael Peña, Kate Mara, Sebastian Stan, Benedict Wong, Mackenzie Davis, Donald Glover
Directed by: Ridley Scott
Based on: The book The Martian written by Andy Weir.
Notes: I was very apprehensive about this movie. The book was one of the best I’d read in a long time, and I didn’t want Hollywood to ruin it. I also wasn’t thrilled at the casting of Matt Damon. Nothing against him, I just didn’t think he could pull off nerdy. Well, I had nothing to worry about. I think this has to be one of the best adaptations I’ve ever seen. Sure, there are parts missing, but that’s to be expected when you want to tell a story in or under 2 hours. Simply marvelous!

Number 5

Title: The Woman in Black
Year: 2012
Plot: A young solicitor travels to a remote village where he discovers that the vengeful ghost of a scorned woman is terrorizing the locals.
Starring: Daniel Radcliffe, Ciarán Hinds, Janet McTeer, Shaun Dooley, Mary Stockley, Jessica Raine, Liz White
Directed by: James Watkins
Based on: The book The Woman in Black written by Susan Hill.
Notes: Now this is how you do period piece horror! Dripping with atmosphere, it’s suspenseful and sometimes scary. It’s a great ghost story. I haven’t read the book, but I hear this was a good adaptation.

Number 4

Title: Crimson Peak
Year: 2015
Plot: A new bride investigates ghostly visions at a remote gothic mansion that holds dark secrets.
Starring: Mia Wasikowska, Tom Hiddleston, Jessica Chastain, Charlie Hunnam, Jim Beaver, Burn Gorman, Doug Jones
Directed by: Guillermo del Toro
Based on: An original screenplay written by Guillermo del Toro and Matthew Robbins.
Notes: I actually wasn’t thrilled with this one the first time I saw it, mostly because it wasn’t entirely what I expected. But subsequent viewings changed my mind, and now I think it’s wonderful. The locations, the costumes, and yes, the actors, are all stunning.

Number 3

Title: Deliver Us from Evil
Year: 2014
Plot: New York police officer Ralph Sarchie begins investigating a series of disturbing and inexplicable crimes. He joins forces with an unconventional priest schooled in the rituals of exorcism, to combat the frightening and demonic possessions that are terrorizing their city.
Starring: Eric Bana, Edgar Ramírez, Olivia Munn, Joel McHale, Sean Harris, Chris Coy, Dorian Missick, Lulu Wilson, Olivia Horton
Directed by: Scott Derrickson
Based on: The book Beware the Night written by Ralph Sarchie and Lisa Collier Cool.
Notes: I absolutely love this movie. It’s dripping with atmosphere (literally, it’s always raining), it’s tense and scary. All the actors do a standout job.

Number 2

Title: It
Year: 2017
Plot: In the summer of 1989, a group of bullied kids band together to destroy a shape-shifting monster, which disguises itself as a clown and preys on the children of Derry, their small Maine town.
Starring: Jaeden Martell, Finn Wolfhard, Sophia Lillis, Jeremy Ray Taylor, Jack Dylan Grazer, Chosen Jacobs, Wyatt Oleff, Nicholas Hamilton, Owen Teague, Jackson Robert Scott, Bill Skarsgård
Directed by: Andy Muschietti
Based on: The book It written by Stephen King.
Notes: I have nothing but love for the original 1990 miniseries, Tim Curry was the bomb as Pennywise. But this is clearly the superior film. It’s tense, it’s scary, and it’s heartwarming all at the same time. The characters are wonderfully written (which is no surprise considering they’re Stephen King characters). And Bill Skarsgård really made the character his own and did an amazing job at it.

Number 1

Title: The Conjuring
Year: 2013
Plot: Paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren work to help a family terrorized by a dark presence in their farmhouse.
Starring: Patrick Wilson, Vera Farmiga, Lili Taylor, Ron Livingston, Shanley Caswell, Joey King, Hayley McFarland, Kyla Deaver, Shannon Kook, John Brotherton, Mackenzie Foy, Sterling Jerins, Steve Coulter, Joseph Bishara
Directed by: James Wan
Based on: The book House of Darkness, House of Light by Andrea Perron.
Notes: Over the years, this has become my comfort movie. Whenever I’m not feeling well, or if I don’t know what to do with myself, I’ll throw this film on. It’s so well done, we really care about the family since they spend time getting to know them. Whatever your thoughts on the real Ed and Lorraine Warren are (cough frauds cough), there’s no denying that their stories make for excellent films!

And that’s it! I hope you enjoyed my list. What are your favourites of the 2010’s? Let me know!

M.

My Top 25 Vampire Films

Vampires are my favourite subgenre of horror. I have seen so many and have at least liked almost all of them (a vampire movie has to be really bad for me to hate it). There are still a lot that I haven’t seen though. I haven’t seen any of the Hammer vampire movies, nor the French erotic ones. There’s also a few notable ones that by all accounts I really should have seen by now. Only Lovers Left Alive, Byzantium, Sinners, Thirst (2009), The Invitation, and Doctor Sleep have all been on my watch-list for what feels like forever and I just never got around to them. So who knows, maybe this list will change once I’ve seen those. But for now, here are my top 25 favourite vampire movies!

Number 25

Title: Sundown: The Vampire in Retreat
Year: 1989
Plot: Reclusive vampires lounge in a lonely American town. They wear sunscreen to protect themselves. A descendant of Van Helsing arrives with hilarious consequences.
Starring: David Carradine, Bruce Campbell, Morgan Brittany, Jim Metzler, Deborah Foreman, Maxwell Caulfield, M Emmet Walsh, Dana Ashbrook
Directed by: Anthony Hickox
Based on: An original screenplay written by Anthony Hickox and John Burgess.
Notes: I generally don’t like comedies (not cause I don’t like to laugh, I’m just real picky), but this one is completely charming.

Number 24

Title: Twilight series
Year: 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012
Plot: Human Bella falls in love with vampire Edward while her best friend, the werewolf Jacob, is in love with her.
Starring: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner, Peter Facinelli, Billy Burke, Elizabeth Reaser, Ashley Greene, Jackson Rathbone, Nikki Reed, Kellan Lutz, Michael Sheen, Jamie Campbell Bower, Rachelle Lefevre, Bryce Dallas Howard, Cam Gigandet, Lee Pace, Anna Kendrick, Michael Welch, Casey LaBow, Dakota Fanning
Directed by: Catherine Hardwicke, Chris Weitz, David Slade, Bill Condon
Based on: The Twilight series of books by Stephanie Meyer (Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Breaking Dawn).
Notes: I know, I know. But you know, Meyer tried something different. Some of it landed, some of it didn’t, but I respect what she tried to do. I enjoyed these films for what they were, light, popcorn fluff.

Number 23

Title: Salem’s Lot
Year: 2004
Plot: Writer Ben Mears returns to his childhood home of Jerusalem’s Lot and discovers that it is being terrorized by vampires.
Starring: Rob Lowe, Andre Braugher, Donald Sutherland, Samantha Mathis, Robert Mammone, Dan Byrd, Rutger Hauer, James Cromwell, Andy Anderson
Directed by: Mikael Salomon
Based on: The book Salem’s Lot by Stephen King.
Notes: The book is so very good that it got made into 3 movies, 1979, 2004, and 2024. Only this one was any good. And not only because Rob Lowe is a cutie.

Number 22

Title: Priest
Year: 2011
Plot: A warrior priest disobeys church law to track down a pack of vampires who have kidnapped his niece.
Starring: Paul Bettany, Cam Gigandet, Maggie Q, Karl Urban, Lily Collins, Brad Dourif, Stephen Moyer, Christopher Plummer, Alan Dale, Mädchen Amick
Directed by: Scott Stewart
Based on: The Korean comic series Priest, created by Hyung Min-woo. The book, in turn, was heavily inspired by the video game Blood by Monolith Productions.
Notes: I honestly don’t remember much about this film except the fact that I loved it and that Karl Urban as a vampire is almost too sexy. That alone should give it its spot on the list.

Number 21

Title: Innocent Blood
Year: 1992
Plot: Marie is a vampire with a thirst for bad guys. When she fails to properly dispose of one of her victims, a violent mob boss, she teams up (and falls in love) with the cop trying to put him away.
Starring: Anne Parillaud, Anthony LaPaglia, Robert Loggia, David Proval, Rocco Sisto, Chazz Palminteri, Tony Sirico, Kim Coates, Angela Bassett, Luis Guzmán, Don Rickles
Directed by: John Landis
Based on: An original screenplay written by Michael Wolk.
Notes: I generally don’t like mob movies, but add a vampire in and I guess that’s all it takes to win me over. This one is funny, sexy, and bloody all at once and I’m here for it.

Number 20

Title: Dracula
Year: 1979
Plot: In 1913, the charming, seductive and sinister vampire Count Dracula travels to England in search of an immortal bride.
Starring: Frank Langella, Laurence Olivier, Kate Nelligan, Donald Pleasence, Trevor Eve, Jan Francis, Janine Duvitski, Tony Haygarth, Sylvester McCoy
Directed by: John Badham
Based on: The book Dracula by Bram Stoker.
Notes: This was the first introduction I had to Dracula way back when I was a little one. I haven’t watched it in literal decades, so the details are fuzzy, but I used to watch it over and over so that cements its place in the list.

Number 19

Title: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Year: 1992
Plot: Ditzy teenager Buffy discovers she’s part of a long line of vampire slayers and with the help of her new mentor, the Watcher Merrick, she takes on a master vampire, Lothos, and his minions.
Starring: Kristy Swanson, Donald Sutherland, Luke Perry, Rutger Hauer, Paul Reubens, Michele Abrams, Hilary Swank, David Arquette, Paris Vaughan, Candy Clark
Directed by: Fran Rubel Kuzui
Based on: An original screenplay written by Joss Whedon.
Notes: This movie is nowhere near as good as the tv show that followed it, but it set the stage nicely. It’s hilariously campy and great fun. Paul Reubins is absolutely hilarious.

Number 18

Title: John Carpenter’s Vampires
Year: 1998
Plot: Recovering from an ambush that killed his entire team, a vengeful vampire slayer must retrieve an ancient Catholic relic that, should it be acquired by vampires, will allow them to walk in sunlight.
Starring: James Woods, Daniel Baldwin, Sheryl Lee, Thomas Ian Griffith, Tim Guinee, Maximilian Schell, Mark Boone Junior, Gregory Sierra, Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa
Directed by: John Carpenter
Based on: The book Vampire$ by John Steakley.
Notes: I don’t get all the hate that this film gets. No, it’s not Shakespeare, but it’s not trying to be. It’s just a fun, action-packed vampire romp.

Number 17

Title: From Dusk Till Dawn
Year: 1996
Plot: The Gecko brothers, two dangerous outlaws on a wild crime spree, kidnap a father and his two kids and head south to a seedy Mexican bar to hide out in safety. Soon they realize that they’re not in a typical bar, as the entire place begins to teem with vicious, blood-sucking vampires.
Starring: George Clooney, Harvey Keitel, Juliette Lewis, Quentin Tarantino, Ernest Liu, Salma Hayek, Cheech Marin, Danny Trejo, Tom Savini, Fred Williamson, John Hawkes
Directed by: Robert Rodriguez
Based on: An original screenplay written by Quentin Tarantino.
Notes: I was one of the lucky ones that did not know the vampiric twist of this film. I literally stood up and cheered when Salma Hayek vamps out. What follows is one long fight for survival and it’s so much fun. The makeups and practical effects are stellar.

Number 16

Title: The Last Man on Earth
Year: 1964
Plot: When a disease turns all of humanity into the living dead, the last man on earth becomes a reluctant vampire hunter. But is he truly alone?
Starring: Vincent Price, Franca Bettoia, Emma Danieli, Giacomo Rossi Stuart, Umberto Raho
Directed by: Ubaldo Ragona, Sidney Salkow
Based on: The book I am Legend by Richard Matheson
Notes: I don’t often like old timey movies, they really have to be something special. And this one is. Vincent Price is great as the weary vampire hunter (even if they act more like zombies, they are, in fact, vampires). Awesome movie with a gut-punch ending.

Number 15

Title: My Best Friend is a Vampire
Year: 1987
Plot: After an intense sexual encounter with a beautiful woman, a teenage delivery boy finds himself turning into a vampire, while being pursued by a couple of clumsy vampire hunters.
Starring: Robert Sean Leonard, Evan Mirand, Cheryl Pollak, Rene Auberjonois, David Warner, Paul Willson, LeeAnne Locken, Cecilia Peck, Fannie Flagg, Kenneth Kimmins
Directed by: Jimmy Huston
Based on: An original screenplay written by Tab Murphy.
Notes: Another vampiric comedy, this time leaning in to the teenage angle. Robert Sean Leonard is cute as all hell in this and does a great job in the role of a teen turned vamp. A campy good time!

Number 14

Title: Underworld
Year: 2003
Plot: Selene, a vampire warrior, is entrenched in a conflict between vampires and werewolves, while falling in love with Michael, a human who is sought by werewolves for unknown reasons.
Starring: Kate Beckinsale, Scott Speedman, Michael Sheen, Shane Brolly, Bill Nighy, Sophia Myles, Erwin Leder, Kevin Grevioux, Wentworth Miller
Directed by: Len Wiseman
Based on: An original screenplay written by Len Wiseman, Danny McBride, and Kevin Grevioux.
Notes: Definitely more style over substance, but I’ll be darned if I don’t just love this movie. The sequels are meh, but this one is great.

Number 13

Title: Queen of the Damned
Year: 2002
Plot: The vampire Lestat wakes from his long sleep and becomes a rock star whose music wakes up the equally beautiful and monstrous queen of all vampires.
Starring: Stuart Townsend, Aaliyah, Marguerite Moreau, Vincent Perez, Paul McGann, Lena Olin, Tiriel Mora, Matthew Newton
Directed by: Michael Rymer
Based on: The books The Vampire Lestat and Queen of the Damned by Anne Rice.
Notes: Trying to squeeze these 2 books together to make one film was probably a bad idea, but I don’t care cause I love this movie, warts and all. I know it’s bad, but I can’t help it. The soundtrack is absolutely bitchin’.

Number 12

Title: Subspecies
Year: 1991
Plot: Three students get caught in the struggle between a good vampire and his evil brother in the Transylvanian mountains.
Starring: Anders Hove, Laura Mae Tate, Michael Watson, Irina Movila, Michelle McBride, Ivan J Rado
Directed by: Ted Nicolaou
Based on: An original screenplay written by Jack Canson and David Pabian, based on a story created by Charles Band.
Notes: Ah, Full Moon. Their films can either be amazing, or they can be shite. This one happens to be amazing. I’m not a huge fan of the sequels, but this first one is great as a stand-alone film.

Number 11

Title: Abigail
Year: 2024
Plot: After a group of criminals kidnap the ballerina daughter of a powerful underworld figure, they retreat to an isolated mansion, unaware that they’re locked inside with no normal little girl.
Starring: Melissa Barrera, Alisha Weir, Dan Stevens, Kathryn Newton, Kevin Durand, Angus Cloud, William Catlett, Giancarlo Esposito, Matthew Goode
Directed by: Matt Bettinelli-Olpin, Tyler Gillett
Based on: An original, contemporary reimagining of the classic 1936 Universal movie Dracula’s Daughter. That movie in turn is based on a short story called Dracula’s Guest by Bram Stoker, but this movie takes that core premise and puts a modern, original spin on it by framing the story as a kidnap-heist gone wrong.
Notes: I was surprised by this movie. I was definitely not expecting it to be so high up in my list, but I really loved it. It’s funny, tense, and a bloody good time.

Number 10

Title: Stake Land
Year: 2010
Plot: A vampire epidemic has swept across what is left of the nation’s abandoned towns and cities, and it’s up to Mister, a death dealing, rogue vampire hunter, to get Martin, his protegé, safely north to Canada, the continent’s New Eden.
Starring: Connor Paolo, Nick Damici, Kelly McGillis, Danielle Harris, Gregory Jones, Traci Hovel
Directed by: Jim Mickle
Based on: An original screenplay written by Nick Damici and Jim Mickle.
Notes: Dark and atmospheric, this is how I imagine a real outbreak of the undead would be. This movie goes surprisingly hard, and I love it.

Number 9

Title: The Last Voyage of the Demeter
Year: 2023
Plot: Sailing from Bulgaria to England, the crew of the Demeter is under attack nightly by a monstrous foe.
Starring: Corey Hawkins, Aisling Franciosi, Liam Cunningham, David Dastmalchian, Chris Walley, Jon Jon Briones, Stefan Kapicic, Woody Norman, Nikolai Nikolaeff, Martin Furulund, Javier Botet
Directed by: André Øvredal
Based on: The chapter The Captain’s Log from the book Dracula by Bram Stoker.
Notes: I was skeptical that they could make a movie out of a single chapter of a book, but they really did a great job. The movie could have been boring, taking place all on one boat, but instead it just makes it claustrophobic and inescapable. My only gripe is the over use of cgi, but other than that it’s simply wonderful.

Number 8

Title: Dracula 2000
Year: 2000
Plot: A crew of thieves accidentally unleash Count Dracula upon modern-day New Orleans. Van Helsing tries to recapture the vampire while protecting his daughter, Mary, from Dracula’s dark quest to claim her as his eternal bride.
Starring: Gerard Butler, Justine Waddell, Jonny Lee Miller, Christopher Plummer, Colleen Ann Fitzpatrick, Jennifer Esposito, Omar Epps, Sean Patrick Thomas, Danny Masterson, Jeri Ryan, Nathan Fillion
Directed by: Patrick Lussier
Based on: Characters created by Bram Stoker from his book Dracula.
Notes: This film was not very well received when it came out. It only has a 4.9 on IMDb, but I don’t get it. It’s fun and sexy and just great, popcorn fun.

Number 7

Title: Dracula Untold
Year: 2014
Plot: As his kingdom is being threatened by the Turks, young prince Vlad Tepes must become a monster feared by his own people in order to obtain the power needed to protect his family, and the families of his kingdom.
Starring: Luke Evans, Dominic Cooper, Sarah Gadon, Art Parkinson, Charles Dance, Diarmaid Murtagh, Paul Kaye, William Houston, Noah Huntley
Directed by: Gary Shore
Based on: A character from the book Dracula by Bram Stoker (origin story).
Notes: Absolutely wonderful. They did a great job with the origin story of Dracula as Vlad the Impaler. I very much doubt he was as loving and kind as he was portrayed in the film, but that’s besides the point. My only gripe with the film is Dominic Cooper, who’s quite white, as a Turk. Other than that, it’s almost perfect.

Number 6

Title: Near Dark
Year: 1987
Plot: A mid-western farm boy reluctantly becomes a member of the undead when a girl he meets turns out to be part of a band of southern vampires who roam the highways in stolen cars.
Starring: Adrian Pasdar, Jenny Wright, Lance Henriksen, Bill Paxton, Jenette Goldstein, Joshua John Miller, Tim Thomerson
Directed by: Kathryn Bigelow
Based on: An original screenplay written by Kathryn Bigelow and Eric Red.
Notes: This film had the unfortunate timing of coming out at the same time as The Lost Boys and was unfortunately criminally overlooked. It’s dark, romantic, and bloody, just the way I like them!

Number 5

Title: Interview with the Vampire
Year: 1994
Plot: Against the backdrop of a gloomy San Francisco, the nearly two-century-old vampire, Louis de Pointe du Lac, recounts the unbelievable story of his eternal transformation and a life worse than death to the sceptic reporter, Daniel Molloy.
Starring: Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, Antonio Banderas, Christian Slater, Kirsten Dunst, Stephen Rea, Indra Ové, Thandie Newton
Directed by: Neil Jordan
Based on: The book Interview with the Vampire by Anne Rice.
Notes: Sumptuous and lush, this film is absolutely wonderful. I saw it when it came out, I was 13, and I must have watched it at least 50 times since then.

Number 4

Title: Nosferatu
Year: 2024
Plot: A gothic tale of obsession between a haunted young woman and the terrifying vampire infatuated with her, causing untold horror in its wake.
Starring: Lily-Rose Depp, Nicholas Hoult, Bill Skarsgård, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Willem Dafoe, Emma Corrin, Ralph Ineson, Simon McBurney
Directed by: Robert Eggers
Based on: The 1922 movie Nosferatu, eine Symphonie des Grauens, which in turn was an unauthorized adaptation from the book Dracula by Bram Stoker.
Notes: I wasn’t expecting to love this one as much as I do because I’m not a huge fan of Eggers’ work. But this film is stunning. The actors all do an amazing job, the costumes are wonderful, and Bill Skarsgård is unrecognizable under amazing makeup.

Number 3

Title: Fright Night
Year: 1985
Plot: Teenager Charley Brewster, a diehard horror fan, discovers his charming new next-door neighbor, Jerry Dandridge, is a vampire responsible for a string of local murders. When nobody believes his claims, Charley enlists the help of Peter Vincent, a washed-up actor and television horror host, to hunt the monster down.
Starring: William Ragsdale, Chris Sarandon, Amanda Bearse, Roddy McDowall, Stephen Geoffreys, Jonathan Stark, Dorothy Fielding
Directed by: Tom Holland
Based on: An original screenplay written by Tom Holland.
Notes: This movie is just wonderful. Chris Sarandon made teenage me (and adult me, let’s be real) swoon as Jerry Dandridge. And the practical effects are absolutely amazing and creepy. A definite gem of the 80’s. The remake is worth a gander as well.

Number 2

Title: Bram Stoker’s Dracula
Year: 1992
Plot: Centuries-old vampire Count Dracula comes to England to seduce his barrister Jonathan Harker’s fiancée Mina Murray and wreak havoc in the foreign land.
Starring: Gary Oldman, Winona Ryder, Anthony Hopkins, Keanu Reeves, Sadie Frost, Richard E. Grant, Cary Elwes, Billy Campbell, Tom Waits, Monica Bellucci
Directed by: Francis Ford Coppola
Based on: The book Dracula by Bram Stoker.
Notes: The best version of Dracula, hands down. It’s so beautiful and romantic while still having some tense scenes. The visual and practical effects are amazing.

Number 1

Title: The Lost Boys
Year: 1987
Plot: When a recently divorced mother and her two teenage boys move to a coastal town to stay with her father, it doesn’t take long for the brothers to realize the area is a haven for something much more sinister than party-going surfers.
Starring: Jason Patric, Corey Haim, Dianne Wiest, Kiefer Sutherland, Jami Gertz, Corey Feldman, Jamison Newlander, Barnard Hughes, Edward Herrmann, Alex Winter, Billy Wirth, Brooke McCarter, Chance Michael Corbitt
Directed by: Joel Schumacher
Based on: An original screenplay by Janice Fischer and James Jeremias.
Notes: As long with being my favourite vampire movie of all time, it might just be my favourite movie, full stop. I was 6 when this came out, and my mom bought it on vhs. She hid it, telling me it was too scary for me. By the time she caught me with it, I’d already seen it about 20 times. This film began my lifelong love of horror movies, and more specifically, vampire movies.

And that’s it! I’d put some honourable mentions, but that list would probably be longer than this list. I hope you enjoyed! What are your favourites? Let me know!

M.

My Top 30 Films of the 90’s

I didn’t remember just how many amazing movies were made in the 90’s. I must have made a list of 50 films I loved and then had to pair it down to 30. I was not happy. And then just as I thought I was finished the list, a movie that I forgot came to mind and I had to shift everything. But I finally decided upon 30, so here they are, my 30 favourite films of the 90’s.

Number 30

Title: Scream
Year: 1996
Plot: In the small town of Woodsboro, California, a masked killer begins murdering high school students, and a group of friends must use their knowledge of horror movies to unmask the killer.
Starring: Neve Campbell, Courteney Cox, David Arquette, Skeet Ulrich, Rose McGowan, Matthew Lillard, Jamie Kennedy, Drew Barrymore, Roger Jackson (v.o.)
Directed by: Wes Craven
Based on: An original screenplay written by Kevin Williamson, although he was heavily inspired by the true story of the “Gainesville Ripper”, Danny Rolling, who murdered several college students in 1990.
Notes: So, I know, why is Scream all the way at number 30? Because I sometimes have weird tastes and there’s just 29 movies I love more, that’s why! But yes, of course, this movie is a modern classic. I’m generally not a fan of slashers, but this one is great.

Number 29

Title: The Iron Giant
Year: 1999
Plot: A young boy befriends a giant robot from outer space that a paranoid government agent wants to destroy.
Starring: Eli Marienthal, Harry Connick Jr, Jennifer Aniston, Vin Diesel, Christopher McDonald, John Mahoney, M Emmet Walsh, Cloris Leachman
Directed by: Brad Bird
Based on: The book The Iron Man by Ted Hughes.
Notes: This has to be one of my favourite animations ever. It’s both hilarious and heartwarming. Keep some kleenex close, you’re gonna need it!

Number 28

Title: Practical Magic
Year: 1998
Plot: Two witch sisters, raised by their eccentric aunts in a small town, face closed-minded prejudice and a curse which threatens to prevent them ever finding lasting love.
Starring: Sandra Bullock, Nicole Kidman, Stockard Channing, Dianne Wiest, Aidan Quinn, Goran Visnjic, Evan Rachel Wood, Alexandra Artrip
Directed by: Griffin Dunne
Based on: The book Practical Magic by Alice Hoffman.
Notes: The perfect blend of chick flick and supernatural. And how disgustingly beautiful were Sandra and Nicole?? My goodness..

Number 27

Title: The Matrix
Year: 1999
Plot: When a beautiful stranger leads computer hacker Neo to a forbidding underworld, he discovers the shocking truth: the life he knows is the elaborate deception of an evil cyber-intelligence.
Starring: Keanu Reeves, Laurence Fishburne, Carrie-Anne Moss, Hugo Weaving, Joe Pantoliano, Marcus Chong, Gloria Foster, Matt Doran, Julian Arahanga, Anthony Ray Parker
Directed by: Lana Wachowski, Lilly Wachowski
Based on: An original script written by the Wachowski’s, but they admitted to being heavily inspired by the philosophical book Simulacra and Simulation by Jean Baudrillard.
Notes: This movie is, in a word, iconic. Never mind the slew of sequels that got progressively worse, this movie was so good. Great ideas paired with top-notch action scenes; it was a must-see of the 90s.

Number 26

Title: The Craft
Year: 1996
Plot: After transferring to a Los Angeles high school, Sarah finds that her telekinetic gift appeals to a group of three wannabe witches, who happen to be seeking a fourth member for their rituals.
Starring: Robin Tunney, Fairuza Balk, Neve Campbell, Rachel True, Skeet Ulrich, Breckin Meyer, Christine Taylor, Assumpta Serna
Directed by: Andrew Fleming
Based on: An original screenplay written by Peter Filardi and Andrew Fleming.
Notes: The other movie that came out in ’96 starring Neve Campbell and Skeet Ulrich, I personally prefer this one. Maybe it’s because I identified more with the outcast goth girls? Probably. But this is just a fun witchcraft movie that I can still enjoy even though I’m no longer a teen.

Number 25

Title: Dragonheart
Year: 1996
Plot: The last living dragon and a disillusioned dragon-slaying knight must unite to stop an evil king, who was granted partial immortality.
Starring: Dennis Quaid, Sean Connery (v.o.), Dina Meyer, David Thewlis, Pete Postlethwaite, Jason Isaacs, Brian Thompson
Directed by: Rob Cohen
Based on: An original screenplay written by Charles Edward Pogue and Patrick Read Johnson.
Notes: I haven’t watched this since the early 2000s I’d wager, so I can’t be sure if the cgi holds up. But I remember it being pretty great.

Number 24

Title: The Prophecy
Year: 1995
Plot: Archangel Gabriel is searching for the soul of a supremely evil human to win a war that’s raging between angels and bring hell on earth.
Starring: Christopher Walken, Elias Koteas, Virginia Madsen, Eric Stoltz, Viggo Mortensen, Amanda Plummer, Adam Goldberg, Moriah Shining Dove Snyder
Directed by: Gregory Widen
Based on: An original screenplay written by Gregory Widen.
Notes: Viggo as Lucifer is one of the most unsettling, even downright scary, things you’ll ever see. Holy crap.

Number 23

Title: To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Newmar
Year: 1995
Plot: Three drag queens travel cross-country until their car breaks down, leaving them stranded in a small town where they turn the resident’s lives upside down.
Starring: Patrick Swayze, Wesley Snipes, John Leguizamo, Stockard Channing, Jason London, Jennifer Milmore, Blythe Danner, Beth Grant, Alice Drummond, Chris Penn, Arliss Howard
Directed by: Beeban Kidron
Based on: An original screenplay written by Douglas Carter Beane.
Notes: I absolutely love this film and can watch it over and over. It’s so funny and heartwarming at the same time. And how beautiful is John Leguizamo as Chi Chi? My goodness..

Number 22

Title: The Mummy
Year: 1999
Plot: At an archaeological dig in the ancient city of Hamunaptra, an American serving in the French Foreign Legion accidentally awakens a mummy who begins to wreak havoc as he searches for the reincarnation of his long-lost love.
Starring: Brendan Fraser, Rachel Weisz, John Hannah, Arnold Vosloo, Kevin J O’Connor, Oded Fehr, Erick Avari, Jonathan Hyde, Patricia Velasquez, Omid Djalili
Directed by: Stephen Sommers
Based on: An original screenplay written by Stephen Sommers, although it is a re-imagining of the 1932 Universal film of the same name.
Notes: Is this movie really only number 22? Wow, there were great movies in this decade! This film is so fun and of course I eat up anything even remotely about ancient Egypt. And 90’s Brendan Fraser? Yes please!

Number 21

Title: Ever After
Year: 1998
Plot: Danielle de Barbarac is a spirited young woman forced into servitude by her wicked stepmother after her father’s death, who falls in love with Prince Henry after a chance meeting.
Starring: Drew Barrymore, Anjelica Huston, Dougray Scott, Melanie Lynskey, Megan Dodds, Patrick Godfrey, Lee Ingleby, Kate Lansbury, Walter Sparrow, Matyelok Gibbs, Judy Parfitt, Timothy West, Jeroen Krabbé
Directed by: Andy Tennant
Based on: An original screenplay written by Susannah Grant, Andy Tennant, and Rick Parks, inspired by the 1697 Cinderella fairy tale written by Charles Perrault.
Notes: One of my very favourite chick flicks. Such a beautiful story and stupidly romantic, Danielle is actually a good role model for women and girls to follow.

Number 20

Title: House on Haunted Hill
Year: 1999
Plot: An amusement park mogul offers a group of diverse people $1,000,000 to spend the night in a haunted house with a horrifying past.
Starring: Geoffrey Rush, Famke Janssen, Ali Larter, Taye Diggs, Peter Gallagher, Chris Kattan, Bridgette Wilson-Sampras, Max Perlich, Jeffrey Combs
Directed by: William Malone
Based on: An original screenplay written by Robb White and Dick Beebe. It is a loose remake of the 1959 movie of the same name starring Vincent Price.
Notes: Now, I love Vincent Price, but gods was the original boring! And I have trouble with plastic skeletons on wires, I’ll be honest. This remake is slick and scary, perfectly updated for modern audiences.

Number 19

Title: Stargate
Year: 1994
Plot: An Egyptologist and a retired US Army Colonel unlock an ancient ring-shaped device discovered in Giza. They travel through a wormhole to the desert planet Abydos, where they discover a human civilization enslaved by the alien Ra, who poses as a god, and work to overthrow him to return home.
Starring: James Spader, Kurt Russell, Jaye Davidson, Alexis Cruz, Mili Avital, Erick Avari, Viveca Lindfors, Leon Rippy, John Diehl, Djimon Hounsou, Gianin Loffler
Directed by: Roland Emmerich
Based on: An original screenplay written by Dean Devlin and Roland Emmerich, inspired in part by ancient astronaut theory, notably Chariots of the Gods by Erich Von Däniken.
Notes: Marrying ancient Egyptian-like culture and space travel? Sign me up! It also doesn’t hurt that James Spader was an absolute fox.

Number 18

Title: Empire Records
Year: 1995
Plot: A tight-knit group of record store employees are fighting to save their independent shop from becoming a corporate chain store in a single, chaotic day.
Starring: Anthony LaPaglia, Rory Cochrane, Liv Tyler, Johnny Whitworth, Renée Zellweger, Robin Tunney, Ethan Embry, Debi Mazar, Maxwell Caulfield, Brendan Sexton III, Coyote Shivers, James ‘Kimo’ Wills
Directed by: Allan Moyle
Based on: An original screenplay written by Carol Heikkinen, based on her personal experiences working at a Tower Records in Phoenix, Arizona.
Notes: I can’t even explain how much I love this film. I saw it when it first came out (I was 14), and I fell instantly in love with it, and have been ever since. Thankfully, it still holds up well today, and I give it a watch every once in a while, and it never fails to make me smile.

Number 17

Title: Seven
Year: 1995
Plot: Two detectives try to track down a serial killer who chooses his victims based on the seven deadly sins.
Starring: Morgan Freeman, Brad Pitt, Gwyneth Paltrow, R Lee Ermey, Richard Roundtree, Reg E Cathey, Peter Crombie, John Cassini, Kevin Spacey
Directed by: David Fincher
Based on: An original screenplay written by Andrew Kevin Walker.
Notes: Such a brilliant piece of film. Well written, well acted, with a gut-punch of an ending that will stick with you long after the movie is done.

Number 16

Title: The Silence of the Lambs
Year: 1991
Plot: A young FBI rookie is sent to ask the help of brilliant cannibalistic killer Dr Hannibal Lecter in catching another killer who kidnaps his victims, holds them for many days, then skins them to make a ‘woman suit’.
Starring: Jodie Foster, Anthony Hopkins, Scott Glenn, Ted Levine, Anthony Heald, Frankie Faison, Brooke Smith, Lawrence T Wrentz, Diane Baker
Directed by: Jonathan Demme
Based on: The book The Silence of the Lambs by Thomas Harris.
Notes: This is, quite possibly, my favourite serial killer movie of all time. No surprises there, it’s such a classic. Did you know, despite having top billing, Anthony Hopkins only has about 18 minutes of screen time?

Number 15

Title: Stigmata
Year: 1999
Plot: When a young woman becomes afflicted by stigmata, a priest is sent to investigate her case, which may have severe ramifications for his faith and for the Catholic church itself.
Starring: Patricia Arquette, Gabriel Byrne, Jonathan Pryce, Nia Long, Thomas Kopache, Enrico Colantoni, Rade Serbedzija, Dick Latessa
Directed by: Rupert Wainwright
Based on: An original screenplay written by Tom Lazarus and Rick Ramage.
Notes: My lifelong crush on Gabriel Byrne aside, this is just an awesome movie. I must have seen it over 20 times, maybe even more! I love religious horror when it’s done right.

Number 14

Title: It
Year: 1990
Plot: In 1960, seven pre-teen outcasts fight an evil demon who poses as a child-killing clown. Thirty years later, they reunite to stop the demon once and for all when it returns to their hometown.
Starring: Tim Curry, Richard Thomas, Jonathan Brandis, Annette O’Toole, Emily Perkins, Harry Anderson, Seth Green, Dennis Christopher, John Ritter
Directed by: Tommy Lee Wallace
Based on: The book It by Stephen King
Notes: I watched this when it came out, which meant I was 9 years old. Pennywise traumatized the crap out of me, and I’ve hated clowns ever since. But despite all this, I loved it and still do. Part two is not nearly as good as part one, which is why it’s not higher on the list.

Number 13

Title: Hackers
Year: 1995
Plot: Teenage hackers discover a criminal conspiracy with plans to use a computer virus that will capsize five oil tankers unless a ransom is paid.
Starring: Jonny Lee Miller, Angelina Jolie, Jesse Bradford, Matthew Lillard, Renoly Santiago, Fisher Stevens, Laurence Mason, Lorraine Bracco, Marc Anthony, Wendell Pierce, Alberta Watson
Directed by: Iain Softley
Based on: An original screenplay written by Rafael Moreu.
Notes: It was one of the first films to really get me interested in computers. And even though I was very disappointed to find out real hacking is nothing like what is shown in this film, I’ve always had my own computer since then. So much fun, so much eye candy, and to top it all off, a totally bitchin’ soundtrack.

Number 12

Title: The Crow
Year: 1994
Plot: The night before his wedding, musician Eric Draven and his fiancée are brutally murdered by members of a violent gang. On the anniversary of their death, Eric rises from the grave and assumes the mantle of the Crow, a supernatural avenger.
Starring: Brandon Lee, Michael Wincott, Rochelle Davis, Ernie Hudson, Bai Ling, Anna Thomson, David Patrick Kelly, Angel David, Laurence Mason, Michael Massee, Jon Polito, Tony Todd
Directed by: Alex Proyas
Based on: The graphic novel The Crow by James O’Barr
Notes: I’m generally not a huge fan of action movies, but this was a huge exception. With its gothic esthetic and supernatural elements, this became one of my all-time favourite movies.

Number 11

Title: Event Horizon
Year: 1997
Plot: A rescue crew is tasked with investigating the mysterious reappearance of a spaceship that had been lost for seven years. It did not come back alone.
Starring: Laurence Fishburne, Sam Neill, Joely Richardson, Kathleen Quinlan, Jason Isaacs, Jack Noseworthy, Richard T Jones, Sean Pertwee
Directed by: Paul WS Anderson
Based on: An original screenplay written by Philip Eisner.
Notes: This film scared the snot out of me when I first saw it when it came out (I was 16), and still manages to give me goosebumps today. A sign of a job well done!

Number 10

Title: The Exorcist III
Year: 1990
Plot: As a police lieutenant mourns on the anniversary of his friend’s death (Father Karras, from the first film), a serial killer strikes whose MO is eerily similar to a killer’s who’s been dead for 15 years.
Starring: George C Scott, Ed Flanders, Brad Dourif, Jason Miller, Nicol Williamson, Scott Wilson, Nancy Fish, and George DiCenzo
Directed by: William Peter Blatty
Based on: The book Legion by William Peter Blatty.
Notes: This is the only sequel that The Exorcist should of had, instead of the abomination that was made (seriously, what the hell was that??) It’s a great story, and has real scares, with none of the camp that 90’s horror was so famous for. A real, under-rated gem. It also has the best jumpscare ever.

Number 9

Title: The Stand
Year: 1994
Plot: After a man-made super flu kills 99% of the people on earth, the survivors band together into two groups, one drawn by dreams of a kind old lady, the others by an evil dark man.
Starring: Gary Sinise, Molly Ringwald, Jamey Sheridan, Adam Storke, Laura San Giacomo, Ruby Dee, Rob Lowe, Corin Nemec, Matt Frewer, Miguel Ferrer, Ray Walston
Directed by: Mick Garris
Based on: The book The Stand by Stephen King.
Notes: I saw this at 13 when it first aired on tv, and I hadn’t read the book yet, which was probably a good thing, since it allowed me to love the mini-series, and not continuously compare it to the book. When I read the book a few years later, I was amazed at how much extra stuff was in it, but my love of the show was already cemented. It’s hopelessly dated, but it’s still a fun watch.

Number 8

Title: Interview with the Vampire
Year: 1994
Plot: A man who has lost his wife and baby in childbirth is offered immortality by a charming but ruthless vampire. We follow him through his centuries of life as he tells his story to a young writer.
Starring: Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, Kirsten Dunst, Antonio Banderas, Christian Slater, Stephen Rea, Domiziana Giordano, Indra Ové, Thandie Newton
Directed by: Neil Jordan
Based on: The book Interview with a Vampire by Anne Rice.
Notes: So beautiful and sumptuous. Incredibly acted and written, it follows the book quite closely (which is to be expected when the author writes the screenplay). A lot of the actors don’t look like their book counterparts, but the movie is so well done that I was able to forgive this.

Number 7

Title: Only You
Year: 1994
Plot: As a teen, Faith was told that her destiny is with a man named Damon Bradley. Years later, when she’s about to marry someone else, a Damon Bradley calls to wish them well, and Faith blows off her wedding to follow Damon to Italy.
Starring: Marisa Tomei, Robert Downey Jr, Bonnie Hunt, Joaquim de Almeida, Fisher Stevens, Billy Zane, Adam LeFevre, Siobhan Fallon Hogan
Directed by: Norman Jewison
Based on: An original screenplay written by Malia Scotch Marmo.
Notes: Films don’t get much more schmoopy than this, folks. This is the very definition of romantic. My heart flutters a little every time I see it.

Number 6

Title: Clueless
Year: 1995
Plot: Popular, rich girls Cher and Dionne decide to take a new, frumpy student under their wing and give her a makeover, while their love lives run amok.
Starring: Alicia Silverstone, Stacey Dash, Brittany Murphy, Paul Rudd, Donald Faison, Elisa Donovan, Breckin Meyer, Jeremy Sisto, Justin Walker, Julie Brown, Twink Caplan, Wallace Shawn, Dan Hedaya
Directed by: Amy Heckerling
Based on: The book Emma by Jane Austen (loosely based).
Notes: My favourite teen movie of all time. It’s over the top and ridiculous in so many ways, but the actors are all perfect in their roles, and the film comes off as completely sweet and charming instead of grating and self-indulgent, as rich teens probably actually are.

Number 5

Title: Jurassic Park
Year: 1993
Plot: An industrialist invites some experts to visit his theme park of cloned dinosaurs. After a power failure, the creatures run loose, putting everyone’s lives, including his grandchildren’s, in danger.
Starring: Sam Neill, Laura Dern, Jeff Goldblum, Richard Attenborough, Ariana Richards, Joseph Mazzello, Bob Peck, Martin Ferrero, Samuel L Jackson, Wayne Knight, BD Wong
Directed by: Steven Spielberg
Based on: The book Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton.
Notes: The first, the original, and still the best. The effects more than hold up today.

Number 4

Title: Sleepy Hollow
Year: 1999
Plot: A slightly eccentric Constable is sent to the small town of Sleepy Hollow to investigate killings that the locals are sure were committed by a ghostly headless horseman.
Starring: Johnny Depp, Christina Ricci, Miranda Richardson, Michael Gambon, Jeffrey Jones, Casper van Dien, Richard Griffiths, Michael Gough, Marc Pickering, Lisa Marie, Ian McDiarmid, Christopher Walken
Directed by: Tim Burton
Based on: The book The Legend of Sleepy Hollow by Washington Irving.
Notes: This is Burton and Depp at their very best, when the creative mojo was still mojoing, and they were still making terrific pictures together. The scenery is dark and brooding, the characters are all captivating, and Johnny Depp is, of course, absolutely gorgeous. Simply wonderful.

Number 3

Title: The Shawshank Redemption
Year: 1994
Plot: A wrongfully convicted banker forms a close friendship with a hardened convict over a quarter century while retaining his humanity through simple acts of compassion.
Starring: Tim Robbins, Morgan Freeman, Bob Gunton, William Sadler, Clancy Brown, Gil Bellows, James Whitmore, Mark Rolston
Directed by: Frank Darabont
Based on: The novella Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption by Stephen King.
Notes: With an IMDb score of 9.3/10, I don’t really think I need to explain why this one is so good. The acting, the writing, the filming, everything is amazing. A wonderful story about the resilience of the human spirit.

Number 2

Title: The Sixth Sense
Year: 1999
Plot: After being shot by a resentful former patient whom he failed to help, a Philadelphia child psychologist seeks redemption by treating a young boy with a disturbing secret.
Starring: Bruce Willis, Haley Joel Osment, Toni Collette, Olivia Williams, Trevor Morgan, Mischa Barton, Donnie Wahlberg
Directed by: M Night Shyamalan
Based on: An original screenplay written by M Night Shyamalan
Notes: I do love me a good old haunting. I remember when I saw this for the first time, I went to see it at the cinema with my cousin. We were both so blown away by that ending, we went back to see it again right after, just to see if we could spot any mistakes that would have the twist make no sense. We couldn’t. And thankfully, unlike a lot of films with such twists, this film is so good that even knowing what’s going to happen doesn’t take any enjoyment away from the film.

Number 1

Title: Bram Stoker’s Dracula
Year: 1992
Plot: After seeing a photograph of a woman who resembles his long-dead wife, a centuries old vampire travels to England to find her.
Starring: Gary Oldman, Winona Ryder, Anthony Hopkins, Keanu Reeves, Sadie Frost, Cary Elwes, Richard E Grant, Tom Waits, Monica Bellucci
Directed by: Francis Ford Coppola
Based on: The novel Dracula by Bram Stoker.
Notes: I won’t deny the effect that the classics have had on modern film. Without the original Universal monsters, we might not have near as many great movies as we do. But it stands that I have trouble with old timey films. So I much prefer this one to the original. So lush, so beautiful, romantic, sometimes creepy. Simply put, perfect. Besides Keanu’s accent, of course! haha

And here are a few of the films that almost made the list, but not quite:

The Truth About Cats & Dogs
While You Were Sleeping
Stir of Echoes
Cruel Intentions
The Relic
From Dusk Till Dawn
The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert
10 Things I Hate About You
Twister
The Good Son
The Lion King
Get Real
The Witches
Army of Darkness
Romeo + Juliet
Little Women
Fried Green Tomatoes
Benny & Joon
The Cutting Edge
Dazed and Confused
Dark City
Total Recall
Can’t Hardly Wait
Cry-Baby
Merlin
The Frighteners
The Pit and the Pendulum
Subspecies
Darkman

And there it was, my top 30 films of the 90’s! What are some of your favourites? Let me know!

M.

My Top 12 Films of the 70s (and Before!)

I love watching lists on YouTube, and one of the guys I like watching is Daniel over on The Cobwebs Channel. He’s a fan of all things horror, so his lists often reflect that. One series of videos he made is his favourite horror films of each decade, starting with the 30s. I was inspired to make my own version of that, but not only horror films. So be prepared for a grab bag of stuff, hehe. I’m not really a fan of old timey films, so my first post will be for the 70s and before, and I was only able to find 12 that I really loved. Starting next post, though, it’ll be a top 30, and I had all the trouble in the world to keep it at 30. So, without further ado, here’s my favourite films of the 70s (and before)!

Number 12

Title: Cleopatra
Year: 1963
Plot: Queen Cleopatra VII of Egypt experiences both triumph and tragedy as she attempts to resist the imperial ambitions of Rome.
Starring: Elizabeth Taylor, Rex Harrison, Richard Burton, George Cole, Hume Cronyn, Cesare Danova, Kenneth Haigh, Andrew Keir, Martin Landau, Roddy McDowall, Robert Stephens, Pamela Brown
Directed by: Joseph L Mankiewicz, Rouben Mamoulian
Based on a book?: Yes, The Life and Times of Cleopatra by Carlo Maria Franzero
Notes: I absolutely love ancient history, so it’s almost a given that I’d love this. It’s beautiful, it’s lush, the costumes are out of this world (and cost a pretty penny, even in 1960s terms). The only reason it’s not higher up on the list is the second half of the film lulls a bit and is not nearly as good as the first half. The film is also unbelievably long, clocking in at 5h 20m, which I wouldn’t have minded if the Marc Antony part was as good as the Julius Caesar part.

Number 11

Title: The Rocky Horror Picture Show
Year: 1975
Plot: A rain-soaked couple take refuge in the castle of a (sweet) transvestite mad scientist from outer space who is about to unveil his greatest creation.
Starring: Tim Curry, Susan Sarandon, Barry Bostwick, Richard O’Brien, Patricia Quinn, Little Nell Campbell, Peter Hinwood, Jonathan Adams, Meat Loaf, Charles Gray
Directed by: Jim Sharman
Based on a book?: No
Notes: I hated this film the first time I saw it. I don’t even remember who got me to give it a second chance, but I thank them. This is one of only 2 musicals in any of these lists, cause I’m generally not a fan (I’m not counting Disney films as musicals, they’re their own beast). It’s silly, it’s campy and it’s a lot of fun.

Number 10

Title: Dracula
Year: 1979
Plot: In 1913, the charming, seductive and sinister vampire Count Dracula travels to England in search of an immortal bride.
Starring: Frank Langella, Laurence Olivier, Kate Nelligan, Donald Pleasence, Trevor Eve, Jan Francis, Tony Haygarth
Directed by: John Badham
Based on a book?: Yes, Dracula by Bram Stoker
Notes: This is the first iteration of Dracula that I ever saw (when I was probably too young), and so when I saw Bram Stoker’s Dracula in 1992, I was confused as to why they switched Mina and Lucy’s characters. Imagine my surprise when I read the book and found that the ’92 version had the right of it. I still have no idea why this version switched the names. It’s a little long winded at times, but it’s a beautiful film, Langella is very smooth as the Count.

Number 9

Title: Psycho
Year: 1960
Plot: A woman on the run stops for the night at a lonely motel where she meets the nice, if a little odd, Norman Bates.
Starring: Anthony Perkins, Janet Leigh, Vera Miles, John Gavin, Martin Balsam, John McIntire, Simon Oakland
Directed by: Alfred Hitchcock
Based on a book?: Yes, Psycho by Robert Bloch
Notes: What can I say about this classic, besides the fact that it’s almost surprising I like it as much as I do? I’m generally not a fan of old timey movies, and I’m generally not a fan of slashers, but there are exceptions to everything. I also can’t deny the effect that this film had on the horror industry as a whole. Being done by a respected director, it put the whole world on notice that horror was more than B-movies.

Number 8

Title: The Ghost and Mrs Muir
Year: 1947
Plot: In 1900, a young widow finds her seaside cottage is haunted and forms a unique relationship with the ghost.
Starring: Gene Tierney, Rex Harrison, George Sanders, Edna Best, Vanessa Brown, Anna Lee
Directed by: Joseph L Mankiewicz
Based on a book?: Yes, The Ghost and Mrs Muir by Josephine Leslie (under the pseudonym RA Dick)
Notes: Such a cozy, warm movie. I loved the interaction between the gruff old sea captain’s ghost and the eponymous Mrs Muir. I really don’t have much to say about this film besides I was pleasantly surprised that I loved it.

Number 7

Title: Some Like it Hot
Year: 1959
Plot: After two male musicians witness a mob hit, they flee the state in an all-female band disguised as women, but further complications set in.
Starring: Tony Curtis, Jack Lemmon, Marilyn Monroe, George Raft, Pat O’Brien, Joe E Brown, Joan Shawlee
Directed by: Billy Wilder
Based on a book?: No
Notes: I absolutely love this film. Yes, the relationships are a little problematic when you think too hard about it, but it’s so charming, so romantic, even funny at times. And Marilyn Monroe was stunning!

Number 6

Title: Invasion of the Body Snatchers
Year: 1956
Plot: A small-town doctor learns that the population of his community is being replaced by emotionless alien duplicates.
Starring: Kevin McCarthy, Dana Wynter, Larry Gates, King Donovan, Carolyn Jones, Jean Willes, Ralph Dumke, Virginia Christine
Directed by: Don Siegel
Based on a book?: Yes, The Body Snatchers by Jack Finney
Notes: When this title is brought up, it’s usually the 70s version that gets all the love. But I prefer this one by leaps and bounds. The sense of creeping dread is there just under the surface, and it’s wonderfully executed.

Number 5

Title: Robin Hood
Year: 1973
Plot: Robin Hood, an outlaw with a heart of gold, must save his beloved Nottingham from the evil Prince John all the while wooing his childhood love, Maid Marian.
Starring: Brian Bedford, Phil Harris, Monica Evans, Peter Ustinov, Terry-Thomas, Andy Devine, Pat Buttram, Roger Miller, Carole Shelley
Directed by: Wolfgang Reitherman, David Hand
Based on a book?: While the story itself originates from poems written starting in the 14th century, the first real book written about Robin Hood was The Merry Adventures of Robin Hood by Howard Pyle
Notes: This was one of my favourite movies growing up, so imagine my surprise to learn that it was not well received when it came out. Sure, the character of Little John is basically just Baloo from The Jungle Book (even voiced by the same actor), but the film itself is fun and sweet with some great songs.

Number 4

Title: The Last Man on Earth
Year: 1964
Plot: When a disease turns all of humanity into the living dead, the last man on earth becomes a reluctant vampire hunter.
Starring: Vincent Price, Franca Bettoia, Emma Danieli, Giacomo Rossi Stuart, Umberto Raho
Directed by: Ubaldo Ragona, Sidney Salkow
Based on a book?: Yes, I Am Legend by Richard Matheson
Notes: Vincent Price is an absolute legend in the horror community, and even though I haven’t seen many of his films, I know this. This film is dark, bleak, and lonely, with a gut punch ending. An absolute hidden classic in my opinion.

Number 3

Title: Wizards
Year: 1977
Plot: On a post-apocalyptic Earth, a wizard and his faire folk comrades fight an evil wizard who’s using technology in his bid for conquest.
Starring: Bob Holt, Jesse Welles, Richard Romanus, David Proval, Steve Gravers, Jim Connell, Peter Hobbs, Mark Hamill
Directed by: Ralph Bakshi
Based on a book?: No
Notes: I saw this when I was way too young to appreciate the gravity of what was happening in this world. Now that I’m older, I still love it, but for entirely different reasons. This animation is definitely not for kids. Unless, of course, we’re talking about a kid like me, hehe.

Number 2

Title: The Sword in the Stone
Year: 1963
Plot: A poor boy named Arthur learns the power of love, kindness, knowledge and bravery with the help of a wizard called Merlin in the path to become one of the most beloved kings in English history.
Starring: Rickie Sorensen, Karl Swenson, Junius Matthews, Sebastian Cabot, Norman Alden, Martha Wentworth, Alan Napier
Directed by: Wolfgang Reitherman, Clyde Geronimi, David Hand
Based on a book?: Yes, The Sword in the Stone by TH White
Notes: This is one of my absolute favourite Disney movies of all time. While my love of others that I saw as a kid has somewhat faded, I can still watch this one and love it as much as I did back then. It’s so much fun! The scene where Archimedes is laughing his ass off at Merlin after he got his beard stuck in the propellers of a toy airplane gets me every time.

Number 1

Title: The Exorcist
Year: 1973
Plot: When a malevolent entity possesses a young girl, her mother seeks the help of two Catholic priests to save her life.
Starring: Ellen Burstyn, Linda Blair, Jason Miller, Max von Sydow, Lee J Cobb, Kitty Winn, Jack MacGowran, William O’Malley, Rudolf Schündler
Directed by: William Friedkin
Based on a book?: Yes, The Exorcist by William Peter Blatty
Notes: As if this is a surprise to anyone who knows me. Thinking of other horror films of the era, this one just stands head and shoulders above the rest. It’s such a bleak film, dealing with things such as the loss of faith and despair. Yes, of course, there are the gross out and scary scenes, but the film is so much more then that. I strongly recommend it to anyone who loves horror and for some reason still haven’t seen it. It holds up surprisingly well for a film made in the early 70s.

And that’s my list! What are your favourites?
Stay tuned for the 80s, coming soon!

M.

Remakes I Find Better Than the Original

So, I mostly tend to be in the camp of “leave movies alone, stop making unnecessary remakes”. But every so often, they’ll remake something that either I didn’t like the original at all, or was surprised at how much better something turned out. Here are 20 remakes that, to me, are better than the original. I’ve ranked them, but outside of my top 5, a lot of them are pretty interchangable.

NUMBER 20

Title: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe
Year: 2005
Remake of: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe (1988)
Starring: Georgie Henley, William Moseley, Skandar Keynes, Anna Popplewell, Tilda Swinton, James McAvoy, and Liam Neeson (voice)
Directed by: Andrew Adamson
Why it’s Better: Just for production value alone. This film is beautiful, and a very good adaptation of the book.

NUMBER 19

Title: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Year: 2003
Remake of: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)
Starring: Jessica Biel, Jonathan Tucker, Eric Balfour, Erica Leerhsen, Mike Vogel, and Andrew Bryniarski
Directed by: Marcus Nispel
Why it’s Better: I absolutely hated the original. Like hated. I was surprised that I liked this one as much as I did. Sure, it’s got that glossy feeling that a lot of horror had in the 2000’s, but it’s still a lot of fun.

NUMBER 18

Title: The Phantom of the Opera
Year: 1989
Remake of: The Phantom of the Opera (1925)
Starring: Jill Schoelen, Robert Englund, Alex Hyde-White, Bill Nighy, and Stephanie Lawrence
Directed by: Dwight H Little
Why it’s Better: The original is a classic, of course, but I’m not a huge fan of silent films. This one leans much more into horror, and I’m all about that!

NUMBER 17

Title: Thirteen Ghosts
Year: 2001
Remake of: 13 Ghosts (1960)
Starring: Tony Shalhoub, Matthew Lillard, Shannon Elizabeth, Embeth Davidtz, Rah Digga, and F Murray Abraham
Directed by: Steve Beck
Why it’s Better: This is by no means a great movie. But I’ll be darned if I don’t love it to pieces! The setting of a glass house is so cool, and the ghosts look incredible!

NUMBER 16

Title: Romeo + Juliet
Year: 1996
Remake of: Romeo and Juliet (1968)
Starring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Claire Danes, John Leguizamo, Harold Perrineau, and Pete Postlethwaite
Directed by: Baz Luhrmann
Why it’s Better: I do like Shakespeare’s stories, but lets be honest, most of the adaptations are stuffy affairs. This one takes the story into modern times, while still holding on the the essence of the story. Absolutely wonderful!

NUMBER 15

Title: Dawn of the Dead
Year: 2004
Remake of: Dawn of the Dead (1978)
Starring: Sarah Polley, Ving Rhames, Jake Weber, Mekhi Phifer, and Kevin Zegers
Directed by: Zack Snyder
Why it’s Better: I’m generally not a fan of zombie movies, and I find the originals by Romero uninteresting. But this one is amazing. It also one of the greatest openings in horror movie history!

NUMBER 14

Title: Crime and Punishment in Suburbia
Year: 2000
Remake of: Crime and Punishment (there are so many…)
Starring: Monica Keena, Vincent Kartheiser, Ellen Barkin, Michael Ironside, Jeffrey Wright, and James DeBello
Directed by: Rob Schmidt
Why it’s Better: Boy did I love this film when it came out. I was 19, and deeply in love with Vincent Kartheiser. I’m not sure it’s a completely accurate adaptation, besides the move to modern times. But I love it.

NUMBER 13

Title: The Grudge
Year: 2004
Remake of: Ju-on: The Grudge (2002)
Starring: Sarah Michelle Gellar, Jason Behr, William Mapother, Clea DuVall, Bill Pullman, and Takako Fuji
Directed by: Takashi Shimizu (who better to direct then the director of the original!)
Why it’s Better: I’m almost ashamed to say it, but I’m just not a fan of J-horror. I find it so weird and disjointed. So yes, I prefer this American remake. That noise still haunts me…

NUMBER 12

Title: The Amityville Horror
Year: 2005
Remake of: The Amityville Horror (1979)
Starring: Ryan Reynolds, Melissa George, Jesse James, Jimmy Bennett, Chloë Grace Moretz, and Rachel Nichols
Directed by: Andrew Douglas
Why it’s Better: I hated the original so very much, that literally anything would have been better. What we got was just a fun haunted house story. And who doesn’t love Ryan Reynolds?

NUMBER 11

Title: The Blob
Year: 1988
Remake of: The Blob (1958)
Starring: Shawnee Smith, Kevin Dillon, Donovan Leitch, Jeffrey DeMunn, Candy Clark, and Joe Seneca
Directed by: Chuck Russell
Why it’s Better: I have trouble with most old timey films. They have to be exceptional for me to be on board. And the ’58 version was just kinda slow and silly. This one takes that idea and cranks it up to 11. The practical effects are absolutely amazing. So much fun!

NUMBER 10

Title: Dorian Gray
Year: 2009
Remake of: The Picture of Dorian Gray (1945)
Starring: Ben Barnes, Ben Chaplin, Colin Firth, Maryam d’Abo, and Fiona Shaw
Directed by: Oliver Parker
Why it’s Better: Two words: Ben Barnes. fans self Oh, we need more? Again, old timey movies aren’t my bag. The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde is actually one of my favourite books (yes, I can deal with old timey books, just not movies), and I find this version to be the superior film.

NUMBER 9

Title: The Crazies
Year: 2010
Remake of: The Crazies (1973)
Starring: Timothy Olyphant, Radha Mitchell, Joe Anderson, Danielle Panabaker, and Christie Lynn Smith
Directed by: Breck Eisner
Why it’s Better: Another Romero zombie film, I didn’t like it for the same reason I didn’t like his “of the Dead” series. This one ratchets everything up, and is leagues better than the original. I love the fact that it’s not dead coming back to life, but a virus that makes you homicidal. Great film.

NUMBER 8

Title: Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves
Year: 1991
Remake of: The Adventures of Robin Hood (1938) There have been many other adaptations of this story as well.
Starring: Kevin Costner, Morgan Freeman, Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio, Christian Slater, Alan Rickman, and Michael Wincott
Directed by: Kevin Reynolds
Why it’s Better: I find this one to be the best of all the Robin Hood films that I’ve seen (except maybe the Disney cartoon). It’s fun, it’s romantic, it’s a little silly, but oh so good!

NUMBER 7

Title: Dune
Year: 2021
Remake of: Dune (1984)
Starring: Timothée Chalamet, Rebecca Ferguson, Jason Momoa, Oscar Isaac, Josh Brolin, Stellan Skarsgård, and Javier Bardem
Directed by: Denis Villeneuve
Why it’s Better: Do I really need to explain? Lynch’s Dune (1984) is one of the silliest, most confusing and disjointed movies I’ve ever seen. Dune part 2 is also excellent.

NUMBER 6

Title: The Mummy
Year: 1999
Remake of: The Mummy (1932)
Starring: Brendan Fraser, Rachel Weisz, John Hannah, Arnold Vosloo, Kevin J O’Connor, and Oded Fehr
Directed by: Stephen Sommers
Why it’s Better: Again the problem with old timey stuff. I only saw part of the original, and that was enough. This version turns it into an action adventure movie, and it’s all the better for it. Plus, 90’s Brendan Fraser? Whew fans self

NUMBER 5

Title: Sleepy Hollow
Year: 1999
Remake of: The Legend of Sleepy Hollow (1949)
Starring: Johnny Depp, Christina Ricci, Miranda Richardson, Michael Gambon, Casper Van Dien, and Christopher Walken
Directed by: Tim Burton
Why it’s Better: I love the original cartoon, it’s very cute, but this version is the ultimate version. All the changes they made fit into the lore perfectly. This is Burton at his finest!

NUMBER 4

Title: The Ring
Year: 2002
Remake of: Ringu (1998)
Starring: Naomi Watts, Martin Henderson, David Dorfman, Brian Cox, and Daveigh Chase
Directed by: Gore Verbinski
Why it’s Better: I tried watching the original, but I just couldn’t get into it. Not a fan of J-horror. They have good ideas, but I guess it’s a cultural difference, I just don’t get their filming style, I guess. This one was, and remains, one of my favourite films. It’s creepy, atmospheric, and very well done.

NUMBER 3

Title: Nosferatu
Year: 2024
Remake of: Nosferatu, eine Symphonie des Grauens (1922)
Starring: Lily-Rose Depp, Nicholas Hoult, Bill Skarsgård, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, and Willem Dafoe
Directed by: Robert Eggers
Why it’s Better: I just did a whole post about this film, so I won’t repeat myself here. But my god, I love this film!

NUMBER 2

Title: It
Year: 2017
Remake of: It (1990)
Starring: Jaeden Martell, Sophia Lillis, Jeremy Ray Taylor, Finn Wolfhard, Jack Dylan Grazer, Chosen Jacobs, Wyatt Oleff, and Bill Skarsgård
Directed by: Andy Muschietti
Why it’s Better: I have a love for the original since I first saw it when I was 9. Tim Curry rocked the role of Pennywise. But I can’t deny that this is the better film. Both movies, however, had trouble with their part two’s. Not bad, but really not as good.

NUMBER 1

Title: Bram Stoker’s Dracula
Year: 1992
Remake of: Dracula (1931) There have been a literal tonne of Dracula movies, some great, others laughable, but this one started it all (I know, I know, Nosferatu came first. But the 1931 version was the first authorized adaptation).
Starring: Gary Oldman, Winona Ryder, Anthony Hopkins, Keanu Reeves, Sadie Frost, Cary Elwes, and Richard E Grant
Directed by: Francis Ford Coppola
Why it’s Better: I won’t deny the effect that the classics have had on modern film. Without the original Universal monsters, we might not have near as many great movies as we do. But it stands that I have trouble with old timey films. But this one. So lush, so beautiful, romantic, sometimes creepy. Simply put, perfect. Besides Keanu’s accent, of course! haha

Hope you enjoy reading this as much as I had making it. I’d almost forgotten how much I like blogging (and making lists. I love lists!)

M.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: Abraham’s Boys

Abraham’s Boys (2025)
Titus Welliver, Brady Hepner, Judah Mackey, Jocelin Donahue, Aurora Perrineau, and Jonathan Howard
Directed by: Natasha Kermani

This one popped up on Shudder the other day, and being the vampire fanatic that I am, I was excited and put it on as soon as I had time. And… oh boy.

Years after defeating Dracula, Abraham Van Helsing and his wife Mina are raising their 2 sons on a seculded ranch. After finding a woman locked up under the house, the boys are told that the evil has followed them, and the monsters must be erradicated. But who’s the real monster?

SPOILERS INCOMING

Now listen. The concept is amazing. 10/10. It’s based on a story written by Joe Hill, so I’m not overly surprised. But the execution… eh. I’ll start with the acting, which ranged from mediocre to laughably bad. I don’t like to harp on child actors, cause it’s a tough gig, but man. There are good child actors out there. The movie looked decent. They got a suitably creepy old house to film in (not sure if it’s “new old” or “old old”), and the dusty, desolate landscape just adds to the ambiance they were going for.

The idea that Van Helsing is simply a murderer that tricked people into thinking there were real vampires is actually really solid. I guessed it from the beginning of the film, but that’s because I’ve seen movies before. I know how they work (most of the time. I still get surprised every so often.) I tried to track down the source material, but could not find it for the life of me. Should anybody read this and knows where to find it, please let me know. The pacing was all over the place, sometimes so slow that you wonder if anything is happening at all, and other times almost frenetic with its movements. I’m not sure what they were going for, but whatever it was, they failed.

So do I recommend it? Eh. Not really. Unless you’re a diehard fan of vampires. But then again, there were no vampires in this vampire movie. Vampire adjacent? Yeah, that’s it. 5/10

M.

This film is currently on Shudder.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: The Last Voyage of the Demeter

The Last Voyage of the Demeter (2023)
Corey Hawkins, Aisling Franciosi, Liam Cunningham, David Dastmalchian, Woody Norman, Chris Walley, Stefan Kapicic, Jon Jon Briones, Martin Furulund, Nikolai Nikolaeff, and Javier Botet
Directed by: André Øvredal

Demeter

Ok, so I went into this not knowing what to expect. I can tell you what I was hoping for though. A genuinely scary vampire film. It’s not that I don’t enjoy the various tame Dracula‘s, or even the Twilight‘s, but I wanted to be scared this time. And let me tell you, this film is almost there. Almost. The Nosferatu-esque makeup is genuinely creepy, and it moves with the creep factor that only Javier Botet (or Doug Jones, for that matter, but it’s Botet in this film) can bring. It does a good job of making the story feel claustrophobic and atmospheric. Having the whole film take place on a ship might’ve been risky, especially since it runs at 2 hours, but I was never bored. I was actually nervous for the characters, which is probably because they do a good job of setting them up, and the actors do an excellent job of portraying them.

Despite all this, the ultimate scare factor just wasn’t there. I don’t know, maybe it’s just me, maybe I’ve just seen so many horror films that they leave me cold in the scares department. Or maybe it was that the kills were mostly done with cgi. The blood just doesn’t fall right when it’s not really there. I miss practical effects, but cgi can be a good companion to it when used sparingly. Unfortunately, it was not used sparingly in this film. I was still horrified at the burning scenes, but I think that has more to do with me being inherently afraid of fire than of it looking good. When makeup was really used, it was done very well, so why didn’t they… ah, never mind. Cgi is the thing now, I guess I should just get used to it.

In the end, though, I did quite enjoy the film, and would recommend it to anyone who loves vampire films like I do (Marilyn Manson’s If I Was Your Vampire popped up quite randomly on my Spotify as I write this, I’m amused). I give it a very respectable 7.5/10. 

M.

This film is available for rent or buy on YouTube and Amazon Prime.

Movie Franchises with the Highest Number of Entries, Part 1

Criteria for making the list: Each franchise needs to have at least 7 entries to be included. Theater releases, direct-to-video and TV movies all included, but TV shows are not. Some of the larger franchises are a little hard to sift through, but I’ll do my best. I’ll only be including the films which completely revolve around the same character or subject (example: Neither Van Helsing nor The Monster Squad will be included in the Dracula or Frankenstein franchises, despite both characters being present). I also won’t be counting films that are all part of the same world (like the Marvel and DC universes), they need to be from the same film line. The franchises need to be in either english or french (my native languages). If I wanted to include everything in the world, I’d be here forever. I also won’t include any anime, whatever the language. There’s just way too many, and also I’m not really an anime fan, so there wouldn’t be many anyways. Lastly, I need to have seen at least one entry. So if your favourite franchise isn’t here, I apologize.

And on that note, on to the list! Oh, they also aren’t in any particular order. Enjoy! 🙂

A-Nightmare-on-Elm-Street

Franchise: Nightmare On Elm Street, also called the Freddy franchise
Starring: Robert Englund, Heather Langenkamp, Johnny Depp, Mark Patton, Kim Myers, Patricia Arquette, Craig Wasson, Tuesday Knight, Lisa Wilcox, Beatrice Boepple, Shon Greenblatt, Lisa Zane, Monica Keena, Jason Ritter, Rooney Mara, Jackie Earle Haley and Kyle Gallner
Director(s): Wes Craven, Jack Sholder, Chuck Russell, Renny Harlin, Stephen Hopkins, Rachel Talalay, Ronny Yu, Samuel Bayer
Number of Films: 9
Number I’ve Seen: 5
Do I Like Them?: I loved the first one, the remake was pretty good, New Nightmare was fun, but the rest, meh.
Titles and Release Dates:
A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)
A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy’s Revenge (1985)
A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987)
A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master (1988)
A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child (1989)
Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare (1991)
Wes Craven’s New Nightmare (1994)
Freddy vs. Jason (2003)
A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)

Batman

Franchise: Batman
Starring: Lewis Wilson, Robert Lowery, Adam West, Michael Keaton, Val Kilmer, George Clooney, Christian Bale, Jack Nicholson, Michelle Pfeiffer, Danny DeVito, Tommy Lee Jones, Jim Carrey, Chris O’Donnell, Alicia Silverstone, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Liam Neeson, Katie Holmes, Heath Ledger, Aaron Eckhart, Tom Hardy, Anne Hathaway, and Michael Caine
Director(s): Tim Burton, Joel Schumacher, Christopher Nolan, Eric Radomski, Curt Geda, Jay Oliva, and more
Number of Films: 17
Number I’ve Seen: 8
Do I Like Them?: 3 or 4 of them, yeah. The best one is still Batman Returns, followed closely by The Dark Knight.
Titles and Release Dates:
Batman (1943)
Batman (1966)
Batman (1989)
Batman Returns (1992)
Batman: Mask of the Phantasm (1993)
Batman Forever (1995)
Batman & Robin (1997)
Return of the Joker (2000)
The Batman vs. Dracula (2005)
Batman Begins (2005)
The Dark Knight (2008)
Under the Red Hood (2010)
Year One (2011)
The Dark Knight Rises (2012)
The Dark Knight Returns – Part 1 (2012)
The Dark Knight Returns – Part 2 (2013)
Son of Batman (2014)

Bond

Franchise: James Bond, 007
Starring: Sean Connery, George Lazenby, Roger Moore, Timothy Dalton, Pierce Brosnan, Daniel Craig
Director(s): Terence Young, Guy Hamilton, Lewis Gilbert, John Glen, Martin Campbell, Roger Spottiswoode, Michael Apted, Lee Tamahori, Marc Forster, Sam Mendes
Number of Films: 23
Number I’ve Seen: 1
Do I Like Them?: Nope, which is why I haven’t watched more.
Titles and Release Dates:
Dr. No (1962)
From Russia with Love (1963)
Goldfinger (1964)
Thunderball (1965)
You Only Live Twice (1967)
On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (1969)
Diamonds Are Forever (1971)
Live and Let Die (1973)
The Man with the Golden Gun (1974)
The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)
Moonraker (1979)
For Your Eyes Only (1981)
Octopussy (1983)
A View to a Kill (1985)
The Living Daylights (1987)
Licence to Kill (1989)
GoldenEye (1995)
Tomorrow Never Dies (1997)
The World Is Not Enough (1999)
Die Another Day (2002)
Casino Royale (2006)
Quantum of Solace (2008)
Skyfall (2012)

Children-of-the-corn

Franchise: Children of the Corn
Starring: Peter Horton, Linda Hamilton, Terence Knox, Paul Scherrer, Daniel Cerny, Ron Melendez, Naomi Watts, Karen Black, Stacy Galina, Alexis Arquette, Natalie Ramsey, John Franklin, Claudette Mink, Michael Ironside, David Anders, Daniel Newman, Billy Drago, and Kelen Coleman
Director(s): Fritz Kiersch, David Price, James DR Hickox, Greg Spence, Ethan Wiley, Kari Skogland, Guy Magar, Donald P Borchers, Joel Soisson
Number of Films: 9
Number I’ve Seen: 2
Do I Like Them?: Nope. Well I loved Urban Harvest as a kid, but that’s cause I had a crush on the kid. Seeing it when I was older horrified me, and not in a good way, hehe.
Titles and Release Dates:
Children of the Corn (1984)
Children of the Corn II: The Final Sacrifice 
(1993)
Children of the Corn III: Urban Harvest 
(1995)
Children of the Corn IV: The Gathering 
(1996)
Children of the Corn V: Fields of Terror
 (1998)
Children of the Corn 666: Isaac’s Return
 (1999)
Children of the Corn: Revelation 
(2001)
Children of the Corn 
(2009)
Children of the Corn: Genesis 
(2011)

Dracula

Franchise: Dracula
Starring: A crap ton of actors including Gary Oldman, Christopher Lee, Bela Lugosi, Frank Langella, Gerard Butler, and Luke Evans
Director(s): Again, a crap ton, including Tod Browning, Terence Fisher, John Badham, Francis Ford Coppola, Patrick Lussier, and Gary Shore
Number of Films: Wiki says 78, but there are some missing, like Dracula Rising.
Number I’ve Seen: I honestly don’t know, a lot.
Do I Like Them?: Most of them, yes.
Titles and Release Dates: The Dracula wiki page has 78 entries, I’m obviously not going to list them all here. I’ll list just a handful, and you can go visit this page if you want to see them all. Even they missed a few, though, there are so many out there.
Dracula (1931)
Dracula (1958)
Dracula: Prince of Darkness (1966)
Count Dracula 
(1970)
Dracula
 (1979)
Dracula
 (1992)
Dracula 2000
 (2000)
Dracula: Pages from a Virgin’s Diary
 (2002)
Dracula Untold 
(2014)

Frankenstein

Franchise: Frankenstein
Starring: A whole lot of actors including Boris Karloff, Lon Chaney Jr, Robert DeNiro, Patrick Bergin, and Glenn Strange
Director(s): Again a lot, James Whale, Kenneth Branaugh, and David Wickes included
Number of Films: Different lists yield different numbers of films, from as low as 38 to as high as 76
Number I’ve Seen: From this list, 9
Do I Like Them?: A few of them, yes. The book was wonderful.
Titles and Release Dates: There are too many to list, but here are a choice few.
Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein (1948)
Andy Warhol’s Frankenstein (1973)
Blackenstein (1973)
The Bride (1985)
Bride of Frankenstein (1935)
Frankenstein (1931)
Frankenweenie(2012)
I, Frankenstein (2014)
Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein (1994)

Friday the 13th

Franchise: Friday the 13th
Starring: Betsy Palmer, Adrienne King, Harry Crosby, Laurie Bartram, Jeannine Taylor, Kevin Bacon, Jared Padalecki, Danielle Panabaker, Aaron Yoo, and many more.
Director(s): Sean S Cunningham, Steve Miner, Joseph Zito, Danny Steinmann, Tom McLoughlin, John Carl Buechler, Rob Hedden, Adam Marcus, James Isaac, Ronny Yu, Marcus Nispel
Number of Films: 12
Number I’ve Seen: 3 (I think)
Do I Like Them?: Nope
Titles and Release Dates: 
Friday the 13th (1980)
Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981)
Friday the 13th Part III (1982)
Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter (1984)
Friday the 13th: A New Beginning (1985)
Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (1986)
Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood (1988)
Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan (1989)
Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday (1993)
Jason X (2001)
Freddy vs. Jason (2003)
Friday the 13th (2009)

Halloween

Franchise: Halloween
Starring: Donald Pleasence, Jamie Lee Curtis, Paul Rudd, Danielle Harris, Josh Hartnett, Malcolm McDowell, Scout Taylor-Compton, and many more
Director(s): John Carpenter, Rick Rosenthal, Tommy Lee Wallace, Dwight H Little, Dominique Othenin-Girard, Joe Chappelle, Steve Miner, Rob Zombie
Number of Films: 10
Number I’ve Seen: 4
Do I Like Them?: Not really. 6 and 7 were ok, but 1 and 2 sucked.
Titles and Release Dates:
Halloween (1978)
Halloween II (1981)
Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982)
Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988)
Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (1989)
Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995)
Halloween H20: 20 Years Later (1998)
Halloween: Resurrection (2002)
Halloween (2007)
Halloween II (2009)

Stay tuned for parts 2 and 3!! 🙂

M.

Review Club #3 – Dracula Untold

DraculaUntold

 

First up, here’s Rob from over at MovieRob:

I am by far not the biggest fan of movies in the horror genre, but ever since I was a kid, I’ve enjoyed the “generic” stories of the “original” four; Frankenstein, The Mummy, The Wolfman and of course Dracula.

When this movie came out, I avoided it like the plague because I had heard so many crappy things about it that it just didn’t sound worthwhile to give it a watch.

…But then came Review Club

So I decided that worse comes to worse, I wasted 90 minutes on a movie (which happens now and again)

Instead, I found myself sucked in to the story, because it wasn’t a horror movie, it was instead a historical action/drama with a supernatural element to it.

I could empathize with the characters and although this isn’t a Braveheart or Gladiator, it was still a compelling movie about love, honor and protecting one’s family and loved ones.

This really is an interesting take on the Dracula myth and I liked how it all comes full circle at the end in order to open up the possibility of continuing the storyline.

It’s too bad that it seems that this will be the last of the series because the idea to reboot the “monster” franchises of days of old is a great idea.

7/10

 

Next up is Eric, from The IPC:

When I first saw the trailer for this, I blew it off as PG-13 CGI horseshit and never gave it another thought. Then I saw a couple of positive reviews from some writers I believe in and I was all “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!” You know – I dropped to my knees and aimed my head at the sky and screamed “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!” much to the alarm of my co-workers. Eventually I composed myself and went on about my business and forgot that anything like that had ever happened and then Melanie started Movie Club and she took out her whip and snapped it a few times and said we had to watch this movie and I was all, knee dropping again and I screamed “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!” But, I am loyal and faithful to my friends so I ordered it up and it wasn’t too bad, actually. But I wasn’t really in love with this:

DU1

The opening and first third of the film was pretty good and I was buying into it. I thought it got a little dodgy when he killed 1000 men by himself but…. OK…. the rest of the thing wasn’t too bad – that part where someone falls off of the tower was pretty good but there were too many “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!” moments for me. Would I recommend it? MEH. It’s better than I thought it would be, for sure, but it’s still a movie about how Dracula became Dracula filled with lots of CGI and melodrama. It’s a better vampire movie than that one Twilight movie I watched.

3 out 5 Men Screaming NOs

DU2

 

We continue with Abbi, from abbiosbiston:

Luke Evans plays Vlad, a fifteenth century Transylvanian prince who was once part of the Turkish army after being offered up by his father as a kind of hostage (like they do in Game of Thrones) as a child. During his rule his kingdom has been at peace with the Turks, mostly by paying them off. When the Turkish king, Mehmed (Dominic Cooper) – or I think he was the king anyway – decides he wants a thousand boys for his army, including Vlad’s son (again played by the kid who played Rickon Stark – he’s everywhere), Vlad cannot bring himself to acquiesce. He’s outmanned and outmatched though so he makes a deal with a vampire (Charles Dance) to receive his powers for three days. If Vlad can stay off the old claret for that time he’ll go back to normal if not he’ll be forever changed and the vampire will be released from the cave he’s imprisoned in. Vlad finds himself almost unbeatable but also tortured by an unslakeable thirst. Will he be able to resist and will it all be enough to hold off Mehmed’s horde?

So Luke Evans is super hot and Vlad has some pretty epic powers – infrared vision, sonic hearing, star gazing, he can turn into a fleet of bats… but that is about all that is good about this lacklustre film. The dialogue is stilted, most of the acting is wooden and there is zero character development. This movie is only 92 minutes long but it feels like it goes on forever, probably because it’s hard to give even a single fuck about any of the characters. I didn’t care about Vlad or his inspid wife or Rickon Stark and I half wished the Turks just mowed them down in the first 10 minutes. Oh and what was up with Dominic Cooper playing a Turk? He’s about as convincingly Turkish as I am, and it didn’t help that he’s been taking accent lessons from the Tom Hardy school of sounding not very Russian at all. What a load of batshit. 1/5

 

And lastly, here’s mine:

Mel’s 5 Second Review: Dracula Untold
(2014) Luke Evans, Dominic Cooper, Sarah Gadon, Art Parkinson, Charles Dance, Diarmaid Murtagh, Paul Kaye, William Houston, Noah Huntley, Ronan Vibert

sunburn

This film was torn apart by the critics, getting the abysmal score of 23% on Rotten Tomatoes. The audience liked it a bit more, but still only gave it 59%, and only slightly better on IMDB, with a score of 6.4. And I truly don’t understand why. I thought it was great. No, it wasn’t Shakespeare, but really now, it wasn’t trying to be! Taken as what it is, a vampire action film, it succeeds very well. This origin story starts with the same base as a lot of the films, that Dracula was born from Vlad the Impaler, but everything else is rather new, and interesting. Most of the acting was quite good, the action scenes were fun (if a little over-CGI’d at times), and the characters were engaing enough to keep us caring about them. And yes, the two leads were plenty pleasant to look at. I’m a bit sad that then open end took us all the way into the present, I’d have liked another period piece as a sequel (if they do indeed decide to make one), but then again, Dracula films in the present are relatively few, so it’ll (hopefully) be something fresh. All in all, I thought this film was great fun, and it receives an equally great score of 8.5/10.

This film isn’t currently on Netflix, but is rentable on On Demand. Enjoy!

M.

 

And that’s it for this round! Join us again in 2 weeks for reviews of Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters! 😀

My Top 50 Horror Films

So, articles like the one you’re about to read are actually one of the biggest reasons that I decided to start blogging in the first place. I love reading Top 10 (or more) lists about all sorts of stuff, but I always get frustrated that a lot of the stuff that I enjoy the most either are low in the lists, or not there at all. And the top spots are often reserved for the same old “classics”, most of which I don’t like. After reading the millionth Top Horror Movies article with movies like The Shining, Halloween, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Suspiria and others in the top spots, I decided that I’d make my own blog where I can show people that there are other movies than those in the world, and they’re just as good (or better, even) than those so-called classics.

I also won’t be putting them in exact order, because I just don’t have the patience to sit there and sort them all. I also doubt that I could choose a definitive order to put them in. So what I’ll do is kind of make it a Top 5, each number having a 10-way tie. And those 10 won’t be in any order, either. So with that said, allons-y!! 😀

 

NUMBERS 5

 

Cube

Title: Cube
Released in: 1997
Starring: Maurice Dean Wint, Nicole de Boer, David Hewlett, Nicky Guadagni, Andrew Miller, and Julian Richings
Directed by: Vincenzo Natali
Written by: André Bijelic, Vincenzo Natali, and Graeme Manson
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: Seven strangers awaken to find themselves captive in what seems like an endless cubic maze, each door leading either to safety or a gruesome death.
Why I Love It: A brilliant, character driven film that doesn’t shy away from the atrocities that humanity is capable of in a survival of the fittest kind of environment. And while there are a few gruesome scenes when the prisoners accidentally enter a booby trapped room, the film never goes too far with it. Nothing like buckets of pointless gore to ruin a great film.

 

Jeepers Creepers

Title: Jeepers Creepers
Released in: 2001
Starring: Gina Philips, Justin Long, Jonathan Breck, Patricia Belcher, Brandon Smith, and Eileen Brennan
Directed by: Victor Salva
Written by: Victor Salva
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: Siblings Darry and Trish are driving home together from school when they are followed and attacked by a humanoid creature driving a big, rusty truck who wants to eat them to regenerate its own body parts.
Why I Love It: It’s a slightly ridiculous concept with sometimes shaky acting, but the visuals and effects are great, the villain is suitably creepy, and the whole film just gives off a vibe of great fun. It’s not very scary (to me anyways), but it’s always a good time.

 

Re-Animator

Title: Re-Animator
Released in: 1985
Starring: Jeffrey Combs, Bruce Abbott, Barbara Crampton, David Gale, and Robert Sampson
Directed by: Stuart Gordon
Written by: Dennis Paoli, William Norris, and Stuart Gordon
Based On: Herbert West, Re-Animator by HP Lovecraft
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A young medical student finds himself in over his head when new student Herbert West arrives with his experiments. Experiments to bring dead flesh back to life.
Why I Love It: This film is totally nuts, start to finish, but it’s got that 80’s horror charm, and Jeffrey Combs is electrifying, eating up the whole screen every time he’s on it. The film also boasts the most uncomfortable-to-watch “sex” scene in the history of film. You’ll spend most of the film not knowing whether to laugh or cringe, but that’s just part of the appeal of this classic gem.

 

Saw

Title: Saw
Released in: 2004
Starring: Cary Elwes, Leigh Whannell, Danny Glover, Ken Leung, Dina Meyer, Monica Potter, and Shawnee Smith
Directed by: James Wan
Written by: Leigh Whannell
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: Two men wake up in an almost empty room, each chained by the foot on opposite ends of the room, with a dead man sprawled on the ground between them. A cassette player informs them that to escape one must kill the other, or saw their own foot off with a provided jigsaw.
Why I Love It: When it first came out, Saw was unlike anything the horror genre had seen in a long time, a real breath of fresh air. It was a wonderful idea, and very well executed, with only a little shaky acting sometimes. Unfortunately, with all the sequels that came after, the Saw name became synonymous with “crap”, and the brilliance of the first film became lost in the sea of awful sequels.

 

The Crazies

Title: The Crazies
Released in: 2010
Starring: Timothy Olyphant, Radha Mitchell, Joe Anderson, Danielle Panabaker, Christie Lynn Smith, Brett Rickaby, and John Aylward
Directed by: Breck Eisner
Written by: Scott Kosar & Ray Wright
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: Yes
Of what?: Remake of 1973’s The Crazies, directed by George A Romero and starring Lane Carroll
5 Second Synopsis: After having their water contaminated, inhabitants of a small town become infected by a virus that makes them incredibly, mindlessly homicidal.
Why I Love It: Despite its rather silly name, this is a great film. I’m not much of a zombie movie fan, so I was reluctant to watch this one, but I was really glad I finally did. It may be classed as a zombie film, but besides a few similarities to the genre, it’s thankfully quite different. No dead people shambling around trying to eat flesh, this film is tense and sometimes scary, with great acting and awesome effects. This isn’t your grandfather’s zombie film :-p

 

The Pit & the Pendulum

Title: The Pit & the Pendulum
Released in: 1991
Starring: Lance Henriksen, Rona de Ricci, Jonathan Fuller, Stephen Lee, Mark Margolis, Carolyn Purdy-Gordon, Jeffrey Combs, and Frances Bay
Directed by: Stuart Gordon
Written by: Dennis Paoli
Based On: The Pit and the Pendulum by Edgar Allan Poe
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No. While The Pit and the Pendulum has been made into several films, this one isn’t a remake of any particular film.
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: An innocent young woman is arrested for witchcraft and tortured, while the leader of the inquisition, the evil Torquemada, lusts after her.
Why I Love It: I love Poe’s stories and poems, so it’s no surprise that I’d love the films based on his works. The film screams 90’s camp, but that’s hardly a bad thing. Lance Henriksen is wonderfully evil, he really makes the film the little gem that it is.

 

The Relic

Title: The Relic
Released in: 1997
Starring: Penelope Ann Miller, Tom Sizemore, Linda Hunt, James Whitmore, Clayton Rohner, Chi Muoi Lo, Thomas Ryan, and Lewis van Bergen
Directed by: Peter Hyams
Written by: Amy Jones, John Baffo, Rick Jaffa, and Amanda Silver
Based On: Relic by Douglas Preston & Lincoln Child
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A detective teams up with an anthropologist when strange murders are committed in a museum, bodies discovered with the hypothalamus of the brain missing. They discover a strange, monstrous creature living beneath the museum, and it seems to need to eat these missing brain pieces.
Why I Love It: Now, I saw this film before reading the book, which is a very, very good thing. If I’d have read the book first, I’d have been very upset, since the main protagonist of the book series (Special Agent Pendergast) isn’t even in the film! But since I saw the film first, I was able to just take it as it was, and I loved it. It was the best monster movie of its time, and still holds up well today. A real fun ride.

 

Thirteen Ghosts

Title: Thirteen Ghosts
Released in: 2001
Starring: Tony Shalhoub, Embeth Davitz, Matthew Lillard, Shannon Elizabeth, Alec Roberts, JR Bourne, Rah Digga, and F Murray Abraham
Directed by: Steve Beck
Written by: Benjamin Carr & Richard D’Ovidio
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: Yes
Of what?: Remake of 1960’s 13 Ghosts, directed by William Castle and starring Donald Woods
5 Second Synopsis: When his uncle dies, a man takes his two children and their nanny to visit the house that they inherited. While looking through the gorgeous glass house, they unwittingly release 12 very powerful, very homicidal ghosts.
Why I Love It: I’m not sure why I love this one so much, but I really do. I know it’s far from being a perfect film, but I don’t know, I just have so much fun watching it, and the ghosts are just so cool and well done that it doesn’t matter that half the film doesn’t really make sense, hehe.

 

Underworld

Title: Underworld
Released in: 2003
Starring: Kate Beckinsale, Scott Speedman, Michael Sheen, Shane Brolly, Bill Nighy, Sophia Myles, Erwin Leder, Robby Gee, and Wentworth Miller
Directed by: Len Wiseman
Written by: Danny McBride
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A beautiful vampire warrior allies herself with a newly bitten werewolf when she begins to suspect that the war that has been raging for centuries between their two races is built on lies.
Why I Love It: A whole lot of style with a little substance, but it hardly matters. This film is so fun to watch, so visually pleasing that you can’t help but love it. And the story, while it’s the same old same old rehashed stuff, is just different enough to keep you entertained. And talk about eye candy, my goodness…

 

Warlock

Title: Warlock
Released in: 1989
Starring: Julian Sands, Richard E Grant, Lori Singer, Mary Woronov, and Kevin O’Brien
Directed by: Steve Miner
Written by: David Twohy
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: An evil warlock opens a portal from his time, the 17th century, to the present day to escape execution. A righteous witch-hunter jumps into the portal after him just before it closes, and vows to stop the warlock’s evil for good.
Why I Love It: Julian Sands. Do I really need another reason? Oh, I do? Well, I guess it’s a good thing that the film is so much fun, then! Wonderfully campy and acted better than most movies in its genre, it’s definitely a gem of the 80’s.

 

NUMBERS 4

 

Event Horizon

Title: Event Horizon
Released in: 1997
Starring: Laurence Fishburne, Sam Neill, Joely Richardson, Kathleen Quinlan, Jason Isaacs, Jack Noseworthy, Richard T Jones, and Sean Pertwee
Directed by: Paul WS Anderson
Written by: Philip Eisner
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A rescue crew is sent to investigate a ship that has been missing in deep space for years. Once on board, they realize that the abandoned vessel isn’t as empty as they first thought.
Why I Love It: Everything about the film is awesome. Great acting, great effects, great story, and just enough gore to slightly turn your stomach but not enough to just make it a gore-fest (which, you all may know by now, I’m not fond of). Almost 20 years later, it still gives me shivers while watching. A sign of a job well done!

 

Frailty

Title: Frailty
Released in: 2001
Starring: Bill Paxton, Matthew McConaughey, Matt O’Leary, Jeremy Sumpter, and Powers Boothe
Directed by: Bill Paxton
Written by: Brent Hanley
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A man confesses to an FBI agent his family’s story of how his religious fanatic father’s visions lead to a series of murders to destroy supposed “demons.” (Taken from IMDB, I was having a hell of a time trying to make a small synopsis, hehe.)
Why I Love It: It’s absolutely brilliant. Well written, incredibly acted, a wonderfully creepy story with a killer twist, before twists were a dime a dozen. Just wonderful.

 

Ginger Snaps

Title: Ginger Snaps
Released in: 2000
Starring: Katharine Isabelle, Emily Perkins, Kris Lemche, Jesse Moss, Danielle Hampton, John Bourgeois, and Mimi Rogers
Directed by: John Fawcett
Written by: Karen Walton
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: After being attacked by a large, furry creature on the night of a full moon, teenager Ginger and her sister Brigitte are on the lookout for clues that she is turning into a werewolf.
Why I Love It: It’s fun, it’s bloody, it’s smartly written, well acted and has cool practical effects. Werewolf films are hard to do without getting schlocky, but Ginger Snaps manages just fine. Also, Katharine Isabelle is a fox. And she loves making horror films, good news for us pervy horror fans! 😉

 

Idle Hands

Title: Idle Hands
Released in: 1999
Starring: Devon Sawa, Seth Green, Jessica Alba, Elden Henson, Vivica A Fox, Jack Noseworthy, Katie Wright, and Christopher Hart’s hand
Directed by: Rodman Flender
Written by: Terri Hughes & Ron Milbauer
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A stoner’s hand becomes possessed by an evil spirit and it kills his two best friends. To try stop the killing, he chops his hand off but, much to his chagrin, it just keeps moving and escapes his house to go wreak havoc at a school Halloween dance.
Why I Love It: Despite its silly subject matter, this film is actually quite good. Laugh out loud funny with awesome special effects (that still hold up today), it’s a great popcorn movie. Plus, Devon Sawa. Total 90’s babe. Meow.

 

Near Dark

Title: Near Dark
Released in: 1987
Starring: Adrian Pasdar, Jenny Wright, Lance Henriksen, Bill Paxton, Jenette Goldstein, Joshua John Miller, and Tom Thomerson
Directed by: Kathryn Bigelow
Written by: Kathryn Bigelow & Eric Red
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: After being bit by a beautiful vampire, a young man is given an ultimatum by her “family”: make a kill within a week, or die. When he realizes he can’t kill, he and the girl run off, with her family in hot pursuit.
Why I Love It: I saw this for the first time as a teenager, and it had everything a teenage girl could possibly want. Romance, eye candy, and lots and lots of blood. Oh yeah 😀

 

Repo! The Genetic Opera

Title: Repo! The Genetic Opera
Released in: 2008
Starring: Alexa Vega, Anthony Stewart Head, Paul Sorvino, Terrance Zdunich, Sarah Brightman, Paris Hilton, Bill Moseley, and Nivek Ogre
Directed by: Darren Lynn Bousman
Written by: Terrance Zdunich & Darren Smith
Based On: Their play of the same name.
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: Set in a future where surgery has become a fashion statement, a chronically ill teen longs for the outside world. When she finally gets her wish, she’s quick to notice that not everything in her life is as it seems.
Why I Love It: A goth musical? With Sarah Brightman, Ogre, and Giles? How the heck could I not love it?? Great songs, great performances (even Paris! *gasp!*), and killer costumes, this was an instant cult classic. So much fun.

 

Signs

Title: Signs
Released in: 2002
Starring: Mel Gibson, Joaquin Phoenix, Rory Culkin, Abigail Breslin, Cherry Jones, and Patricia Kalember
Directed by: M Night Shyamalan
Written by: M Night Shyamalan
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A preacher and his family find giant crop circles in their corn. Then they, and the rest of the world, come to realize that this time, it’s no hoax.
Why I Love It: A lot of people say that this was the beginning of the end for Shyamalan’s films, but I really liked this one. Yes, there’s a lot of self indulgent bullshit, but there’s a lot of great, tense moments, too, which more than make up for it.

 

Sinister

Title: Sinister
Released in: 2012
Starring: Ethan Hawke, Juliet Rylance, Fred Dalton Thompson, James Ransone, Michael Hall D’Addario, Clare Foley, and Nick King
Directed by: Scott Derrickson
Written by: Scott Derrickson & C Robert Cargill
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A true crime writer moves his family into a house where a horrific quadruple murder took place. He finds old reels of home video in the attic that leads him to believe that these murders were just one in a string of horrifying serial murders, taking place as far back as the 60’s.
Why I Love It: This is an excellent piece of film. Well acted, well written, awesomely atmospheric. Us horror fans are blessed that an actor of Ethan Hawke’s caliber loves doing horror films. But before you write this off as “just another ghost story”, think again. It’d probably have been higher on the list, but I’ve only seen it once, and so many others are higher simply for being loved longer, hehe.

 

The Exorcism of Emily Rose

Title: The Exorcism of Emily Rose
Released in: 2005
Starring: Laura Linney, Tom Wilkinson, Jennifer Carpenter, Campbell Scott, Colm Feore, Joshua Close, Kenneth Welsh, Duncan Fraser, and Mary Beth Hurt
Directed by: Scott Derrickson
Written by: Paul Harris Boardman & Scott Derrickson
Based On: A true story
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A tough lawyer takes on the case of a priest who is accused of negligent homicide after the death of a young woman on whom he had performed an exorcism.
Why I Love It: Exorcism movies, I find, are either amazing, or they’re crappy. There doesn’t seem to be a middle ground. This one is amazing. You wouldn’t think a courtroom drama and exorcism horror would mesh well together in the same film, but they really do. I don’t believe for a moment that this is actually a true story (not the possession part anyways, the exorcism and trial were real enough, though), but it’s captivating, and all the acting is wonderful, especially from Dexter actress Jennifer Carpenter.

 

The Exorcist III

Title: The Exorcist III
Released in: 1990
Starring: George C Scott, Ed Flanders, Brad Dourif, Jason Miller, Nicol Williamson, Scott Wilson, Nancy Fish, and George DiCenzo
Directed by: William Peter Blatty
Written by: William Peter Blatty
Based On: Legion by William Peter Blatty
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: Yes
Of what?: Sequel to 1973’s The Exorcist, directed by William Friedkin and starring Linda Blair.
5 Second Synopsis: As a police lieutenant mourns on the anniversary of his friend’s death (Father Karras, from the first film), a serial killer strikes whose MO is eerily similar to a killer’s who’s been dead for 15 years.
Why I Love It: This is the sequel that The Exorcist should of had, instead of the abomination that was made (seriously, what the hell was that??) It’s a great story, and has real scares, with none of the camp that 90’s horror was so famous for. A real, under-rated gem.

 

NUMBERS 3

 

Constantine

Title: Constantine
Released in: 2005
Starring: Keanu Reeves, Rachael Weisz, Shia LeBoeuf, Tilda Swinton, Djimon Hounsou, Gavin Rossdale, Pruitt Taylor Vince, Max Baker, and Peter Stormare
Directed by: Francis Lawrence
Written by: Kevin Brodbin & Frank A Cappello
Based On: Hellblazer by Jamie Delano & Garth Ennis
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A supernatural detective stumbles on a world-ending plot while ridding the world of demons.
Why I Love It: I won’t try give credit where none is due, Keanu Reeves is still a pretty bad actor. And yet this movie is awesome. The film doesn’t follow the books very closely (but that’s ok with me since I didn’t enjoy them all that much anyways). But the story is great, the effects are amazing, and the supporting cast is very strong, giving poor Keanu all the help he needs.

 

Dracula 2000

Title: Dracula 2000
Released in: 2000
Starring: Gerard Butler, Justine Waddell, Jonny Lee Miller, Christopher Plummer, Colleen Fitzpatrick, Jennifer Esposito, Omar Epps, Jeri Ryan, and Nathan Fillion
Directed by: Patrick Lussier
Written by: Joel Soisson
Based On: Characters created by Bram Stoker
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No. The Dracula story has been told in countless films, but this film, while based on the same story as all the others, is its own film, not based on its predecessors.
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: In modern-day London, the long-entrapped Count Dracula is unwittingly released by thieves, and goes to New Orleans to find the one born of his blood, Mary Van Helsing.
Why I Love It: It’s fun, hip, relatively well acted, and has a neat new idea for the identity of everyone’s favourite Count. Gerard Butler turns in a mesmerizing performance, it remains one of my very favourite on-screen vampire portrayals of all time. And he’s so sexy in this. So very, very sexy…. mmmmmmm… *snaps out of it* Ok, I’m done, sorry :-p

 

From Dusk Till Dawn

Title: From Dusk Till Dawn
Released in: 1996
Starring: George Clooney, Quentin Tarantino, Harvey Keitel, Juliette Lewis, Ernest Liu, Salma Hayek, Cheech Marin, Danny Trejo, Tom Savini, and Ted Williamson
Directed by: Robert Rodriguez
Written by: Quentin Tarantino
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: Two brothers on the run from the law take a father with his two kids hostage to sneak across the border into Mexico in their RV. Once there, they hole up in a brothel for the night to await a contact. Little do they know that this brothel is also a vampire nest, and they’re going to have to fight through the night if they want to survive.
Why I Love It: What not to love about this film? Badass characters, hyper-violence, buckets of blood, and lots of boobage, this movie is a ton and a half of fun, while still boasting a solid cast of good actors, and killer practical effects. Grab the popcorn and have a blast!

 

Identity

Title: Identity
Released in: 2003
Starring: John Cusack, Ray Liotta, Amanda Peet, John Hawkes, Alfred Molina, Clea DuVall, John C McGinley, William Lee Scott, Jake Busey, and Pruitt Taylor Vince
Directed by: James Mangold
Written by: Michael Cooney
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A group of strangers gets trapped in a small motel while a storm floods the roads. Elsewhere, a doctor awaits the arrival of his patient, who is on death row and is to be executed the next day.
Why I Love It: Despite some rather shaky acting from some of the smaller cast members, this film is amazing. Good acting from the core actors, awesome story that’ll keep you guessing till the very end, and a killer twist that actually makes sense. I’d have preferred the last 2 minutes to be cut from the film, though, I find it kinda cheapens the whole thing, which is why I gave it 9 stars instead of 10.

 

Queen of the Damned

Title: Queen of the Damned
Released in: 2002
Starring: Stuart Townsend, Aaliyah, Marguerite Moreau, Vincent Perez, Paul McGann, Lena Olin, and Matthew Newton
Directed by: Michael Rymer
Written by: Scott Abbott & Michael Patroni
Based On: The Vampire Lestat and Queen of the Damned by Anne Rice
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: Yes
Of what?: Sequel to 1994’s Interview with the Vampire, directed by Neil Jordan and starring Brad Pitt.
5 Second Synopsis: A long-sleeping vampire wakes when a bold and arrogant younger vampire decides to start a rock band, and divulges “vampire secrets” in his lyrics.
Why I Love It: The acting is pretty shaky, the story is so far from Anne Rice’s original idea that it probably shouldn’t be allowed to claim to be based on her books, it’s full of clichés, and yet I love it. And nothing anyone can say will change my mind. Trust me, people have tried :-p

 

Stir of Echoes

Title: Stir of Echoes
Released in: 1999
Starring: Kevin Bacon, Kathryn Erbe, Illeana Douglas, Zachary David Cope, Kevin Dunn, Conor O’Farrell, and Jennifer Morrison
Directed by: David Koepp
Written by: David Koepp
Based On: A Stir of Echoes by Richard Matheson
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: After being hypnotized, a family man starts to unravel after he starts seeing cryptic messages from a ghostly girl.
Why I Love It: Wonderfully acted, creepy and atmospheric, and well written, this is an almost perfect ghost story.

 

The Exorcist

Title: The Exorcist
Released in: 1973
Starring: Linda Blair, Ellen Burstyn, Jason Miller, Max Von Sydow, Lee J Cobb, William O’Malley, and Mercedes McCambridge
Directed by: William Friedkin
Written by: William Peter Blatty
Based On: The Exorcist by William Peter Blatty, a true story
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: After playing with a Ouija board, a young girl is possessed by a malevolent demon. Her mother begs a priest to perform an exorcism to save her.
Why I Love It: Just the right amount of body horror with psychological terror, this is one of the original greats. Saw it for the first time when I was 16, and it still scares me today. A true classic.

 

The Last Man on Earth

Title: The Last Man on Earth
Released in: 1964
Starring: Vincent Price, Franca Bettoia, and Giacomo Rossi-Stuart
Directed by: Ubaldo Ragona
Written by: William F Leicester & Richard Matheson
Based On: I Am Legend by Richard Matheson
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: After an epidemic sweeps the globe and turns everyone into blood-sucking monsters, a lone survivor searches for a cure, while killing as many of the monsters as he can.
Why I Love It: Vincent Price, Richard Matheson, and vampires? Of course I love it! No other reason is necessary! 😀

 

The Mummy

Title: The Mummy
Released in: 1999
Starring: Brendan Fraser, Rachael Weisz, John Hannah, Arnold Vosloo, Kevin J O’Connor, Oded Fehr, Jonathan Hyde, and Patricia Velasquez
Directed by: Stephen Sommers
Written by: Stephen Sommers
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: Yes
Of what?: Reimagining of 1932’s The Mummy, directed by Karl Freund and starring Boris Karloff
5 Second Synopsis: Adventurers looking for treasure and artifacts on an ancient Egyptian site accidentally awaken an evil mummy that had been buried for thousands of years.
Why I Love It: I love anything to do with ancient Egypt, supernatural or otherwise, so it was a given that I’d love this one. Thankfully, it also happens to be great fun to watch.

 

The Stand

Title: The Stand
Released in: 1994
Starring: Gary Sinise, Molly Ringwald, Jamey Sheridan, Adam Storke, Laura San Giacomo, Ruby Dee, Rob Lowe, Corin Nemec, Matt Frewer, Miguel Ferrer, and Ray Walston
Directed by: Mick Garris
Written by: Stephen King
Based On: The Stand by Stephen King
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: After a man-made super flu kills 99% of the people on earth, the survivors band together into two groups, one drawn by dreams of a kind old lady, the others by an evil man.
Why I Love It: I saw this at 13 when it first aired on tv, and I hadn’t read the book yet, which was probably a good thing, since it allowed me to love the mini-series, and not continuously compare it to the book. When I read the book a few years later, I was amazed at how much extra stuff was in it, but my love of the show was already cemented, hehe. It’s hopelessly dated, but it’s still a fun watch.

 

NUMBERS 2

 

Aliens

Title: Aliens
Released in: 1986
Starring: Sigourney Weaver, Michael Biehn, Carrie Henn, Paul Reiser, Lance Henriksen, Bill Paxton, Jenette Goldstein, and William Hope
Directed by: James Cameron
Written by: James Cameron
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: Yes
Of what?: Sequel to 1979’s Alien, directed by Ridley Scott and starring Sigourney Weaver.
5 Second Synopsis: The sole survivor from the first film assists a tough group of space marines in containing the Xenomorph threat, while a malevolent company wants the alien offspring captured alive. Naturally, stuff goes very wrong.
Why I Love It: Do I really have to explain myself? A definite success in the merging of sci-fi and horror genres, it was, and remains, one of the best films of its genre. Everything was done so well that it’s easy to forget that the film wasn’t made recently, but rather almost 30 years ago. A sign of a job well done!

 

Beetlejuice

Title: Beetlejuice
Released in: 1988
Starring: Michael Keeton, Alec Baldwin, Geena Davis, Winona Ryder, Catherine O’Hara, Jeffrey Jones, and Glenn Shadix
Directed by: Tim Burton
Written by: Michael McDowell & Warren Skaaren
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: After a young couple tragically dies in an accident, they’re told that they will have to “haunt” their house for quite a few number of years. When a new family moves in and start making changes to their beloved home, they contact a “bio-exorcist” to make them leave.
Why I Love It: This film almost didn’t make the list at all, since I wasn’t sure if I should include it in a horror list, but it’s so awesome that I decided to go ahead and add it. Wickedly funny with awesome practical effects, this has been one of my favourites since I was a kid.

 

Cabin in the Woods

Title: The Cabin in the Woods
Released in: 2012
Starring: Kristen Connolly, Chris Hemsworth, Fran Kranz, Jesse Williams, Anna Hutchison, Bradley Whitford, Richard Jenkins, Amy Acker, Jodelle Ferland, and Sigourney Weaver
Directed by: Drew Goddard
Written by: Joss Whedon & Drew Goddard
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: Five friends go to a remote cabin in the woods for some R&R. Meanwhile, a government office seems to be preparing for something that involves the group. And that’s pretty much all I can say without giving spoilers, just in case there are still a few horror fans who haven’t seen this.
Why I Love It: “Written by Joss Whedon” was all I needed to see to convince me to go see it. It was so much fun, so tongue-in-cheek, that’s impossible to not love it. There are so many winks to so many horror films and tropes that even after multiple viewings, there’s always something I didn’t notice ‘last time’. Just awesome.

 

Dracula

Title: Dracula
Released in: 1992
Starring: Gary Oldman, Winona Ryder, Anthony Hopkins, Keanu Reeves, Sadie Frost, Cary Elwes, Richard E Grant, Tom Waits, and Monica Bellucci
Directed by: Francis Ford Coppola
Written by: James V Hart
Based On: Dracula by Bram Stoker
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No. The Dracula story has been told in countless films, but this film, while based on the same story as all the others, is its own film, not based on its predecessors, and is actually closer to the book than the rest.
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: After seeing a photograph of a woman who resembles his long-dead wife, a centuries old vampire travels to England to find her.
Why I Love It: I don’t really think I need to explain why I love this film, hehe. The only thing that’s not perfect is Keanu Reeves’ acting :-p

 

House on Haunted Hill

Title: House on Haunted Hill
Released in: 1999
Starring: Geoffrey Rush, Famke Janssen, Ali Larter, Taye Diggs, Peter Gallagher, Chris Kattan, Bridgette Wilson, Max Perlich, and Jeffrey Combs
Directed by: William Malone
Written by: Dick Beebe
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: Yes
Of what?: Remake of 1959’s House on Haunted Hill, directed by William Castle and starring Vincent Price.
5 Second Synopsis: An eccentric millionaire offers a million dollars to one of four guests if they can survive the night in a supposedly haunted mansion, which used to be an asylum with a horrifying past.
Why I Love It: Such a fun film that doesn’t rely on jump scares to creep you out. I absolutely love this one. Strong acting, strong writing, and a superbly creepy setting make this film step ahead of a lot of others in its genre.

 

It

Title: It
Released in: 1990
Starring: Tim Curry, Richard Thomas, Jonathan Brandis, Annette O’Toole, Emily Perkins, Harry Anderson, Seth Green, Dennis Christopher, and John Ritter
Directed by: Tommy Lee Wallace
Written by: Tommy Lee Wallace & Stephen King
Based On: It by Stephen King
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: In 1960, seven outcast kids known as ‘The Losers Club’ fight an evil child-eating demon who poses as a clown. 30 years later, they are called back to fight the same clown again. (from IMDB)
Why I Love It: I watched this when it came out,which meant I was 9 years old. Pennywise traumatized the crap out of me, and I’ve hated clowns ever since. But despite all this, I loved it, and still do. I’m not sure I’d have liked it so much had I seen it for the first time now, because it absolutely screams early 90’s, so I guess it’s a good thing I saw it way back then, hehe.

 

Pitch Black

Title: Pitch Black
Released in: 2000
Starring: Vin Diesel, Radha Mitchell, Cole Hauser, Claudia Black, Rhiana Griffith, Keith David, Lewis Fitz-Gerald, and Simon Burke
Directed by: David Twohy
Written by: Jim Wheat, Ken Wheat, and David Twohy
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A cargo ship carrying a dangerous fugitive crashes on a planet that is always bright. When the sun finally goes down, though, the survivors realize that they are not alone.
Why I Love It: I can’t really explain why I love this one so much. It should have just been a generic crash-land-on-dangerous-planet thing, and yet just because all components were slightly better than usual, it made this film a total gem. At least to me, hehe.

 

Stigmata

Title: Stigmata
Released in: 1999
Starring: Patricia Arquette, Gabriel Byrne, Jonathan Pryce, Nia Long, Thomas Kopache, Rade Serbedzija, Enrico Colantoni, and Dick Latessa
Directed by: Rupert Wainwright
Written by: Tom Lazarus & Rick Ramage
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A young woman is plagued with vicious bouts of stigmata, the wounds of Jesus Christ while being crucified, after receiving a rosary from her mother from Brazil. A priest from the Vatican is sent to investigate.
Why I Love It: I’m usually not big on religious stories, but this one spends more time on the characters, and less time being preachy, and so I enjoyed it very much. The story is great, most of the acting is great, and Gabriel Byrne is a stone-cold fox. Three great reasons to love it, hehehe.

 

The Eye

Title: Gin Gwai (The Eye)
Released in: 2002
Starring: Lee Sin-Je, Lawrence Chou, Candy Lo, Yut Lai So, Edmund Chen, Chutcha Rujinanon, Sue Yuen Wang, Pierre Png, and Yin Ping Ko
Directed by: The Pang Brothers
Written by: Oxide Pang, Danny Pang, and Yuet-Jan Hui
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A young woman, blind from birth, gets cornea transplants, allowing her to finally see. But she soon realizes that her new eyes see much more than everyone else.
Why I Love It: Asian films are often too weird for me to enjoy, but when they get it right, they get it damn right. The acting, effects, and atmosphere are all stupendous. A definite gem, express from Hong Kong.

 

The Woman in Black

Title: The Woman in Black
Released in: 2012
Starring: Daniel Radcliffe, Ciarán Hinds, Janet McTeer, Liz White, Shaun Dooley, Mary Stockley, Roger Allam, Jessica Raine, Sophie Stuckey, and Misha Handley
Directed by: James Watkins
Written by: Jane Goldman
Based On: The Woman in Black by Susan Hill
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: Yes
Of what?: Remake of 1989’s The Woman in Black, directed by Herbert Wise and starring Adrian Rawlins.
5 Second Synopsis: A young, widowed lawyer is sent to close the estate of an old woman who just passed away. While getting her affairs in order in her manor, he is plagued by an evil presence that brings a horrible end to some of the towns’ children.
Why I Love It: Superbly acted and creepily atmospheric, this film was a masterpiece. Young Daniel upped his game for this role, and he did a wonderful job. It’s hard to be in a film with so little dialogue and still be entertaining, but he, and the rest of the cast, managed beautifully. In my opinion, it’s one of the finest films to come out of the horror genre in the last 15 years. The only reason it’s not in the number ones is because all the films up there (save one) are long-time favourites.

 

And now, for the best of the best, my very favourites, the top 10 horror films that I strongly suggest everyone see, even those people who don’t really care for horror. As usual, these aren’t in any order, it’s a 10-way tie for the number 1 slot, hehe. There’s only one recent film, one from 2002, two from 1999, and then the rest are 1994 and earlier. But, like I said in my intro, you won’t be seeing hardly any of the ‘usuals’ in this spot. My number one spot(s) is reserved for films that are actually good 😉 So, without any further ado, here are my-

 

NUMBERS 1

 

Fright Night

Title: Fright Night
Released in: 1985
Starring: Chris Sarandon, William Ragsdale, Amanda Bearse, Roddy McDowall, Stephen Geoffreys, Jonathan Stark, Dorothy Fielding, and Art Evans
Directed by: Tom Holland
Written by: Tom Holland
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A teen becomes suspicious of his new neighbour when bodies of young women are found dumped in trash bags. He soon realizes the suave, handsome man is an evil vampire, and he tries to enlist the help of a tv vampire slayer to stop him.
Why I Love It: One of the original great horror-comedies, this film is fun, campy, and scary. The actors are perfect in their roles, especially Chris Sarandon as the evil yet seductive Jerry Dandridge. The remake, while nowhere near as good as this one, is still worth a gander.

 

Interview with the Vampire

Title: Interview with the Vampire
Released in: 1994
Starring: Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, Kirsten Dunst, Antonio Banderas, Christian Slater, Stephen Rea, Domiziana Giordano, Indra Ové, and Thandie Newton
Directed by: Neil Jordan
Written by: Anne Rice
Based On: Interview with a Vampire by Anne Rice
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A young man who has lost his wife and baby in childbirth is offered immortality by a charming but ruthless vampire. We follow him through his centuries of life as he tells his story to a young writer.
Why I Love It: So beautiful and sumptuous. Incredibly acted and written, it follows the book quite closely (which is to be expected when it’s the author who writes the screenplay). A lot of the actors don’t look like their book counterparts, but the movie is so well done that I was able to forgive this.

 

noes

Title: A Nightmare on Elm Street
Released in: 1984
Starring: Heather Langenkamp, Robert Englund, Johnny Depp, Amanda Wyss, Nick Corri, Charles Fleischer, John Saxon, and Ronee Blakley
Directed by: Wes Craven
Written by: Wes Craven
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: In the dreams of his victims, a spectral child murderer stalks the children of the members of the lynch mob that killed him. (From IMDB)
Why I Love It: This was the very first horror movie I ever saw, even before The Lost Boys, which means I was just a wee thing (only 3 or 4 years old) when I saw it. And it’s stuck with me ever since, still one of my top 10 favourites, even with the sometimes laughable acting and effects. When a movie is this good, lots of stuff can be over-looked! hehe

 

Poltergeist

Title: Poltergeist
Released in: 1982
Starring: Craig T Nelson, JoBeth Williams, Beatrice Straight, Heather O’Rourke, Dominique Dunne, Oliver Robins, Martin Casella, and Zelda Rubinstein
Directed by: Tobe Hooper
Written by: Steven Spielberg, Michael Grais, and Mark Victor
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A young family are visited by ghosts in their home. At first the ghosts appear friendly, moving objects around the house to the amusement of everyone, then they turn nasty and start to terrorize the family before they kidnap the youngest daughter. (from IMDB)
Why I Love It: An absolute classic of the genre, it’s still one of the very best haunted house films ever made, even 32 years later.

 

Sleepy Hollow

Title: Sleepy Hollow
Released in: 1999
Starring: Johnny Depp, Christina Ricci, Miranda Richardson, Michael Gambon, Jeffrey Jones, Casper van Dien, Richard Griffiths, Michael Gough, Marc Pickering, Lisa Marie, Ian McDiarmid and Christopher Walken
Directed by: Tim Burton
Written by: Andrew Kevin Walker
Based On: The Legend of Sleepy Hollow by Washington Irving
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A slightly eccentric Constable is sent to the small town of Sleepy Hollow to investigate killings that the locals are sure were committed by a ghostly headless horseman.
Why I Love It: This is Burton and Depp at their very best, when the creative mojo was still mojoing, and they were still making terrific pictures together. The scenery is dark and brooding, the characters are all captivating, and Johnny Depp is, of course, absolutely gorgeous. Simply wonderful.

 

The Conjuring

Title: The Conjuring
Released in: 2013
Starring: Patrick Wilson, Vera Farmiga, Lili Taylor, Ron Livingston, Shanley Caswell, Hayley McFarland, Joey King, Mackenzie Foy, Kyla Deaver, Shannon Kook, John Brotherton and Joseph Bishara
Directed by: James Wan
Written by: Chad Hayes & Carey Hayes
Based On: The Demonologist: The Extraordinary Career of Ed and Lorraine Warren by Gerald Brittle, a true story.
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: When the strange occurrences in their new home become more frequent and violent, a family of seven asks a husband and wife team of paranormal investigators to help them.
Why I Love It: The most recent film in my whole list, and yet it blew right to one of the top spots almost immediately. Everything in this film is perfect. All the actors are in excellent form, the writing and directing are phenomenal, and it’s more than just a little scary. Not many recent films have this kind of power and atmosphere. If you haven’t seen this yet, I highly reccomend that you drop everything and go watch it right now!! 😉

 

The Lost Boys

Title: The Lost Boys
Released in: 1987
Starring: Jason Patric, Corey Haim, Keifer Sutherland, Jami Gertz, Corey Feldman, Dianne Wiest, Barnard Hughes, Edward Herrmann, Jamison Newlander, Alex Winter, Billy Wirth, Brooke McCarter, Chance Michael Corbitt, Folsom the Dog, and Cody the Dog
Directed by: Joel Schumacher
Written by: Jan Fischer, James Jeremias, and Jeffrey Boam
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: When brothers Sam and Michael move to a new town after their parents divorce, they quickly realize that the town is over-run by vampires. Sam gets help from self-appointed vampire slayers, but for Michael it may be too late…
Why I Love It: It was the first vampire movie I ever saw, and was the beginning of a life-long love affair with all things that go bump in the night. The story isn’t really anything new (I’m not even sure there’s any original ideas left anywhere), but the ride is so fun that it doesn’t matter. Their vampires are the ‘real’ deal; they’re strong, fast, sexy and oh so evil, just the way vamps aught to be, hehe.

 

The Ring

Title: The Ring
Released in: 2002
Starring: Naomi Watts, Martin Henderson, David Dorfman, Brian Cox, Jane Alexander, Lindsay Frost, Amber Tamblyn, Shannon Cochran, and Daveigh Chase
Directed by: Gore Verbinski
Written by: Ehren Kruger
Based On: Ringu (Ring) by Kôji Suzuki
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: Yes
Of what?: Remake of 1998’s Ringu, directed by Hideo Nakata and starring Nanako Matsushima.
5 Second Synopsis: After her niece dies under mysterious circumstances, a journalist promises her sister she will investigate the death. What she finds is a cassette tape that kills you in seven days if you watch it. With the clock ticking, she must figure out what the spirit in the tape wants, or else die like everyone else who has seen it.
Why I Love It: It doesn’t happen very often that a remake is better than the original, but this happens to be one such instance. Despite the dated nature of some of the plot points (does anyone even own vhs anymore? lol), this film is still immensely watchable and creepy, even 12 years later. Everything is wonderful, acting, effects, writing, everything. Not just one of my favourite horror movies, it’s one of my favourite movies, period.

 

The Silence of the Lambs

Title: The Silence of the Lambs
Released in: 1991
Starring: Jodie Foster, Anthony Hopkins, Scott Glenn, Ted Levine, Anthony Heald, Frankie Faison, Brooke Smith, Lawrence T Wrentz, and Diane Baker
Directed by: Jonathan Demme
Written by: Ted Tally
Based On: The Silence of the Lambs by Thomas Harris
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A young FBI rookie is sent to ask the help of brilliant cannibalistic killer Dr Hannibal Lecter in catching another killer who kidnaps his victims, holds them for many days, then skins them to make a “woman suit”.
Why I Love It: I love serial killers. I’ve got this weird, morbid fascination with them. I watch a lot of true crime stuff, read true crime books, and of course, I love serial killer fiction as well. And this film, even after so much time, is still the best of the best. Hannibal Lecter and Buffalo Bill are still two of the creepiest serial killers ever to be captured on film, and it’s still, to my knowledge, the only horror film not only to be nominated for an Oscar for Best Picture, but to win it. And it was very much earned.

 

The Sixth Sense

Title: The Sixth Sense
Released in: 1999
Starring: Bruce Willis, Haley Joel Osment, Toni Collette, Olivia Williams, Trevor Morgan, Mischa Barton, and Donnie Wahlberg
Directed by: M Night Shyamalan
Written by: M Night Shyamalan
Based On: N/A
Remake/reimagining/sequel?: No
Of what?: N/A
5 Second Synopsis: A boy who communicates with spirits that don’t know they’re dead seeks the help of a disheartened child psychologist. (from IMDB)
Why I Love It: I do love me a good old haunting. I remember when I saw this for the first time. I went to see it at the cinema with my cousin. And we were both so blown away by that ending, we went back to see it again right after, just to see if we could spot any mistakes that would have the twist make no sense. We couldn’t. And thankfully, unlike a lot of films with such twists, this film is so good that even knowing what’s going to happen doesn’t take any enjoyment away from the film.

 

PHEW!! That’s it! I’m finally done!! I hope you guys really enjoy this article, it took me more than 3 weeks to complete! (Not working at it full time, obviously, but still!) I had loads of fun making it, and I hope you have as much fun reading it.

Thanks for coming by, and stay tuned for more! (I’ll try my best to return to a more regular posting schedule 🙂 ).

M.